5 Tips for Creating a Terrible Website or Landing Page

5 Tips for Creating a Terrible Website or Landing Page

It's been a while since I put together a tongue-in-cheek post of bad online marketing tips, so I thought I would add to the series that has included 10 Tips to Becoming an Unsuccessful Affiliate and 5 Tips to Creating a Totally Unresponsive and Unprofitable Email Program. Today, I wanted to give you a few really useful suggestions for building a website or landing page that will simply never resonate with your audience and get them to convert.

Our usual "bad tips" disclaimer applies please don't actually follow any of this advice if you want to be a successful affiliate marketer.

1. Focus your content entirely on what you are marketing.

Hey, this website is about the offer(s) you are trying to promote, right? So, why would you want to waste time thinking about your audience? If they aren't interested in what you have to say about how awesome you think the product or service is, then you don't want them as customers anyway! Let them take their money to your competitors and good riddance.

2. Cram your content with endless keywords.

SEO is a great thing and you might as well over-optimize your content by cramming it with as many bolded keywords as possible. Not only will the search engines love this, but your audience will appreciate being reminded of the important terms and keywords that almost certainly helped them find your site in the first place. If possible, you may just want to have entire sentences that are nothing but keywords.

3. Use lots of huge images that take forever to load.

You have some really cool images that you know will really help sell your product or service. Hopefully every one of them is ultra high-resolution, because you want people to be able to really appreciate the details. Even if there isn't a lot of space on your site, you should definitely include as many of these images as possible. If you need to make your page longer and have users scroll down for about 5 minutes to get to see them all, so be it. Besides, if the images are huge, it will take a long time for them all to load. So, if it takes a while to get to the bottom of the page, maybe the images will load by the time a user actually scrolls all the way down.

4. Calls to action are so old-school.

Seriously, haven't we heard enough from these old-school marketing dinosaurs about things like having a good call-to-action? We're in the Internet Age now. Your users are really smart and they can figure out what they are supposed to do on your site without you constantly reminding them to "click here" "apply today" "register now" or whatever other action it is that makes you money. Besides, isn't telling people what to do kind of bossy? Nobody likes that. Let them figure it out on their own.

5. Utilize lots of pop-ups and pop-unders.

You want to make sure you monetize every visitor to your site in as many ways as possible. So, if one pop-up or pop-under is good, then 20 or 30 must be that much better. With this in mind, create tons of pop-ups with every kind of offer you can think of. They don't even need to relate to your site content. Just pick them at random. This way you have the best chance of getting a user to click on at least one of them.

Follow these five tips and I am pretty confident that you will have a really awful site that users will not respond to or ever visit again. Do you have any other great tips for developing a really bad website or landing page?

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