5 Ways For A Smooth Sailing Marriage After Infidelity

Putting back that battered marriage in good shape or in good terms after being caught cheating is a Herculean Task for every couple

. If your relationship is failing, you have to sweat your heart out and strain your muscles to fix it. You have to constantly work for it. What's your game plan? Here are 5 tips to help get that marriage back in top shape and keep it that way forever:

1)Make it a team effort. You can't make things better on your own. You need to be able to work together and talk together to find out where the breakdown occurred. You may have cheated on your own but you didn't get to the place in your marriage where the breakdown began by yourself. It will take two to make it right again.

2)Do not insert old arguments to present ones. Focus on solving the present problem and don't bring up the past. Bringing back the past causes more tension between both of you and only adds up to the pain and difficulty you are already feeling. You have two choices: fix the problem, forgive, then forget; or just simply file a divorce and no need to read further. Work it out together and you'll see that your marriage will be more successful and happy after the disloyalty.

3)Be like the bamboo plant; strong, tall and proud yet still humble enough to bend when necessary. This is the plants secret in surviving Mother Nature's harsh temper. Let it be your guide too. Most people cheat because they have this fairytale bubble floating in their head as to what they want their marriage to be. But face the reality and burst that bubble, live life in reality. So both of you be humble like the bamboo and bend your expectations (and pride too). Take a warm cup of coffee and talk about these expectations, what you want and don't want in marriage, what you can and cannot live without in marriage. Listen to each other and make these dreams meet in the middle.

4)Be willing to work for it. Both of you are going to have to make changes in order for the marriage to work in the long run. How many changes are you each willing to make and do you both believe those changes will be enough? You don't have to work miracles over night. But, if you are both taking baby steps in the right direction you'll find in time that you've reached your destination of "happily ever after" much sooner than you expected.

5)Learn to ask for what you need. The biggest problem that many couples face is that both of you expect the other person to magically know what you want and need and give it to you. Unfortunately, the average married couple is not psychically intoned to one another and do not read the thoughts of the other person until at least 50 years of marriage. So you must learn to tell your partner what you need and what you would like and to ask your spouse what he or she needs and wants from you.

by: T Dub Jackson..

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