A Look At Marriage Counseling

If you and your spouse are having ongoing relationship difficulties

, it may be time to seek marriage counseling. Seeking marriage counseling can be humbling, but it's a sign that you and your spouse care enough about your marriage to improve it.

The first step in marriage counseling is finding a good marriage counselor. You can find listings online or by asking your doctor or clergy. Set up an initial meeting with the counselor.

The first meeting with a potential marriage counselor is essentially an audition. You and your spouse are figuring out if the counselor is someone with whom you're comfortable sharing your marital problems. Ask the counselor what his technique or approach is to counseling, how many sessions he recommends and whether all sessions should be joint sessions or if individual sessions will be expected.

You will also need to be prepared to discuss what types of how to save your marriage you and your spouse are having. The counselor needs to assess if he will be able to assist you with those problems, and you need to assess how comfortable the counselor is addressing those problems. If sexual difficulties are the reason you're seeking marriage counseling but the counselor squirms when you mention this, you may want to look for another counselor.

After your first meeting with a counselor, talk to your spouse. Ask your spouse what he or she thought of the counselor and the session. You may have been comfortable with the counselor, but he may have given your spouse the creeps. Continue meeting with counselors until you find one with whom you and your spouse are both comfortable.

Marriage counseling sessions typically last 45-50 minutes. The cost varies widely and is generally not covered by health insurance. The counseling will ask questions, make observations and facilitate discussion between you and your spouse.

How many counseling sessions you and your spouse need depends on the type of problems and the type of therapy you're seeking. You may just go for a few sessions, or you may go for three or six months. You and your spouse may go for a while, stop, then start going back. As issues arise, you may want to check back in with your counselor and make certain things are still on the right track.

Marriage counseling can be a significant help to you and your spouse. Don't be afraid or ashamed to get the help you need.

by: Dave Taylor

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