Boomers, Check Your Values

Old fashioned values.gotta love em

Old fashioned values.gotta love em. True American values, yessiree.

I have those good old family values. Sadly, nobody believes me because I'm kind of liberal. Most folks think I attend gay weddings where they eat babies, drink soldiers' blood, dance to Muslim tunes and pay for it all with money stolen from honest corporations.

A dear friend of mine is a registered Republican and said to me, "I know I can't afford to be, but it's the values, you know?"

By damn, then, I'm gonna vote Republican. They believe in the family, right? To hell with those baby munching liberals. I'm going to vote for representatives who make sure I get no health care, no mortgage assistance, no tax breaks or anything that might hold my family together! I'm gonna vote for red blooded representatives who support our troops, by God; who needs a flak vest in a bomb zone anyhow! I'm gonna vote for representatives who make sure American business is protected, so it can go build plants overseas! I'm gonna vote for representatives who bail out banks, so CEO's can continue their luxurious lifestyles, they must deserve it, they work so hard putting all that money into lousy investments!

I'm gonna vote for representatives who play patty cake with the rich and make sure they have all the tax breaks they need to purchase a 43rd home and second yacht and a fleet of illegal immigrant maids and gardeners they vote to keep out of the country! I'm gonna vote for those straight shooters, yessiree, because they have the values. Just ask them, they'll tell you, they believe in America, motherhood, apple pie and staying rich!

Yessiree, it's the values, you know?

Boomers, Check Your Values

By: Jane Baskin Smith

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