Buddhism And Loneliness

In Buddhist thinking and commentary, loneliness is often thought of as a means of achieving nirvana

. In fact it was the Buddha's loneliness that pushed him into deep meditation that eventual resulted in his enlightenment. Of course we are none of use Buddha, but yearn for Buddha-like enlightenment. In so far as loneliness is concerned, Buddhist thought as a unique way of describing different types of loneliness. Here is a brief overview of each. complete discipline, not wandering in the world of desire, and not seeking security from one's discursive thoughts.

Desire

This type of loneliness describes the ability to let go and let loneliness simply be. It is a means of self-satisfying and soothing restlessness and the desire to "overcome." It is similar in nature to the meditative practice of letting go of one's thoughts. The more one tries to control and resists simply just being, the further away we move to contentment.

Contentment

This has parallels with Christian thought regarding possessions. Possessions, including relationships can be a burden that moves one away from the path. Feelings of having something to lose, in this case, friends and companionship, brings up feelings of fear and anxiety. The practice of letting go and embracing the condition of loneliness, that is what to be, moves one back on the path.

Avoidance

Popular advice says to "keep busy" to avoid feelings of loneliness. Occupy the body with stuff to do and the mind will tune out the negative feelings. This may be true but ultimately it does not solve the fundamental problem, and that is avoidance. In Buddhist thought it is key to look to one's self to find contentment and understand the root cause.

Discipline

This is a common Buddhist practice in which the discipline is called upon to return to the present moment. Some much of the feeling of loneliness comes from a focus on the past and future. The past or present can represent good times or bad, but in either case, dwelling on it moves from being in the here and now. The loneliness of discipline simply means an acceptance of the way things are at the moment.

Desire

The loneliness of desire involves looking to the world for comforts, specifically the comfort of people. The thinking is that desire solves no problem, least of all loneliness. In fact in Buddhist thought it is necessary to shed desire in order to continue of the path. In this thinking, loneliness is not a problem to be solved, but an experience that simply exists.

Security

This type of loneliness involves the expectation of gaining control of loneliness through one's own mental gymnastics. Relying on thoughts and thinking to solve issues is counter to the discipline of letting go. As in meditation practice, the goal is simply to be. The mind brings forth thoughts and images and it is necessary to acknowledge and let go.

At the end of the day, like much of Buddhist thinking on other human conditions, loneliness is simply a state that should be recognized but lacks any need to be solved or fixed. By letting go of loneliness it dissipates until it is no longer a threat or diversion from the path.

by: Gen Wright

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