Counseling - Want to Know More About Reading a Woman's Mind?
Counseling - Want to Know More About Reading a Woman's Mind
?
Because a man pays close attention to his girlfriend or wife's wants and needs, he must therefore love her. This doesn't always come across to the woman though. Too many men are caught up in paying attention to what matters most to men and not what women are looking for. Men strive for autonomy and independence. Women are looking for greater levels of intimacy with their man. Men miss the boat because they won't adjust their behaviour to a woman's line of reasoning.Most women treasure having at least one very close female friend. This female friend is someone they feel safe enough with to share almost anything. This is an odd thought to a man. Why would he want to share everything with a close friend? Rare is the man who desires this high level of transparency.If given a choice, women will choose love over respect. In the same circumstance, men would rather be respected than loved. This discrepancy cannot be over emphasized.Men find themselves judging the needs of the woman in their life based on their own desires. Women want most to be loved, men want to be respected. Men keep their distance from women out of a misguided belief that they are showing them respect.If a man is going to help a woman feel more loved, he needs to adjust his approach to her. He needs to behave more like a private investigator. Being known intimately by her husband is what a normal woman wants. Being known often translates into feeling loved. The goal is simply to know her not to try and help her solve a problem. I understand this sounds bizarre men, but it's how it works with women.A woman believes that if you love her, you would pursue her. Many men stop pursuing their wives because they don't understand what their wife is trying to say when they share their thoughts and feelings. Men are judged by their problem solving abilities. Men get overwhelmed by the amount women share because they think all the data represents problems to be solved. Women do share for the purpose of solving problems. Women also share simply for the reason of creating closeness.Developing the skill of asking good questions and then listening, is essential for men who want to create a better bond with their mate. Don't kid yourself though gentlemen. Even the hardiest of men can only listen for so long before they get overwhelmed. At about the 15 minute mark, the average male mind turns to jello when engaged in listening to a typical woman's data download. It's vital to put a time limit on the sharing. If you can learn to do this on a regular basis, you will be creating a strong bond with your wife. She will feel more loved and you will be respected by her because of your skilful act.
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