Dating Before Marriage- Why Dont It Work In India

In the Indian society where tradition and values still reign supreme dating before marriage is often looked at with much discernment

. We are still tied down with our old inherited customs where there is no place for dating. It is not well accepted unlike the Western culture where it is deeply rooted and welcomed as well.

In the western countries dating before marriage is not a taboo since the couple may even part ways after sometime, but in India such liberalism doesnt exist. Virtues like chastity and purity are put on a high pedestal in our society. Almost every man will like to have a girl for marriage who is pure and morally upright, who was not in a relationship before marriage. So the families themselves refrain from allowing the girls to be involved in dating. It is frowned upon.

There is no denying of the fact that men and women who go out on a date will be in their best possible behavior and will do everything possible to please him/her. The love slowly blossoms and both find solace in each others company. Almost everything appears in its best colors. At the time of dating most often the couple will often speak a lie about their past or may be any other bitter aspect of their life. But this is true only till the dating phase continues.

The relationship slowly and gradually begins to change after the marriage. As one gets to know each other better, realizing that the other person is almost different from what he appeared to be at the time of dating. He was only pretending to be than what he actually was. As life progresses through various trials and tribulations, the patterns often change. And at one point of time it becomes aptly clear that the partner has changed than what he was post marriage. For most of the youngsters of today, it is quite easy to fall in love and they start believing that the same love will continue post marriage as well. But unfortunately it doesnt always hold true. May be the partner doesnt give much attention to you after marriage, or you get to know about many of his ill habits which were not revealed by him before. The result is parting of ways most often.

It has often been seen that the couples who were passionately and madly in love before marriage seems to get lost of love after marriage. The relationship gets worn off. Whether dating strengthens or spoils a relationship normally depends upon the couples compatibility with each other. Dating before marriage makes a serious impact on the future of both the partners involved. Some regard it as completely normal while others detest it. On an average it all depends upon what you want out of the relationship.

by: Shadaan Alam

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