Dating Relationship - The Mind Game Of Verbal Abuse
"Can't you do anything right" You've heard that in some form or another a few times from your significant other
. Whether it's going out on a date, doing a simple household chore or a non-serious conversation material always is on the defensive with each other. That kind of constant bombardment can set your nerves on edge and allow you to start doubting yourself.
And your significant other knows it. They have seen your abilities and failings and kept mental notes as so they know exactly which buttons to push and when.
Then they take it to a new level. They not only berate you if they're with friends and families but from time to time they humiliate you in public. You didn't do this that or the other thing so now you've ruined the occasion. When the both of you get home they really unload on you.
Just about now there ought to be some righteous outrage on your side. Instead you internalize everything they have said. Maybe they are right which your entire fault is. You were supposed to deal with the situation. Did you're doing so right or not enough or too much? Once your significant other sees that doubt influences air then they step up the attack. The next step is about turning those doubts into cold hard reality. The verbal abuse now comes fast and furious. Anything that happens it doesn't matter how trivial or insignificant becomes an excuse to allow you to feel worse than you do and also absolute that from now on all the blame falls squarely on your shoulders.
But there's something more sinister afoot. In essence they have for all intent and purposes taken control of the relationship.
Yet you should remember that arguably none of this would have been possible if it didn't receive your cooperation. If a dating relationship will probably grow than crucial that both parties love or otherwise respect each other. Verbal abuse is neither. It's emotional, mental and physical control disguised as caring. It benefits no one except the one who is practicing it almost all requires some acceptance from the receiving party.
The catch is in the long and short run it is absolutely corrosive to a dating relationship. They miss the joy of having someone that cares about them contribute equally to make the relationship better. They also lose out on the uniqueness that is you. What you haven't any one else can offer. By trying to exercise total control over you, they are in essence trying to allow you to into exactly what they desire you to be. That is blatant disrespect.
Unfortunately it becomes a vicious circle. You may never be completely what they need you to be. They know it and deep down you know it so they heap more verbal abuse on you with the clear understanding that it'll always be this way.
Some people like to argue. That's an element of who they really are but when they become verbally abusive in a dating relationship then you will need to take a stand. Either they slow it down and work on their behavior or they'll have to find someone else in an attempt to control.