Divorce Often Brings Anger: How To Handle It

When your marriage dies, it really signifies the death of an era in both your lives

. Anytime there is a death in the family, there are often feelings of anger associated with it. If your anger comes as the result of feeling imposed upon or fooled or betrayed, that feeling can be very strong indeed. You will have many important decisions to face during your divorce proceedings, and you don't want your decision-making ability to be impaired by anger: here are some tips on how to deal with it.

Anger is normal

Don't let anyone try to tell you how you "should" feel or that they "understand exactly what you are going through." No one really knows but you how angry you are and only you can take the steps necessary to cope with it effectively. In order to deal with it properly, you must first accept that such a feeling is completely normal under the circumstances. You are not weak nor are you any less of a person because your sadness also contains anger. It is normal. Do not attempt to squelch it or deny that it is there: it will simply eat you up inside. It will need to come out eventually, and you must actively seek ways to vent in non-destructive ways.

Let others think what they want: focus on you

Don't waste time worrying about what other think about both your situation and your anger with it. You need to focus your energies on dealing with it instead. A good family therapist can help you find ways for you to go through these emotions and come out OK on the other side. There is no need to feel embarrassed or ashamed about your anger.

Use physical activity to work out your frustrations

One of the absolute best and most positive ways to deal with feelings of anger is to get some physical exercise: any kind will do. You may want to take up jogging again, or set aside an hour each day for a vigorous walk. Whacking a tennis ball is a great way to take out your frustrations without doing any damage to anyone, and you'll feel a lot better afterwards. Vigorous physical activity releases the "feel-good" hormones called pheromones: you can use all the pheromones you can get right now.

If you are really struggling with your feelings of anger, make sure to seek professional help. Having an impartial ear listen to you without judging you could be just what you need most to cope. You will experience a wide variety of emotions, including anger, as you deal with and proceed through your divorce. It's normal, and it's OK.

by: Art Gib

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