Do You Have to Forgive Your Wife for Cheating to Save Your Marriage?
You've heard that forgiveness is divine but is it really necessary to save your marriage
after your wife cheated? It's more necessary than you probably realize. Forgiveness is not saying that you approve of the action. Forgiveness is saying that you love your wife enough to accept her even though she has done something that hurts you.
Too many people believe that forgiveness is the equivalent of saying the deed was OK. That simply isn't the case. But, in marriage, forgiveness, for deeds and misdeeds large and small, is completely necessary. Cheating definitely falls into this category.
Why is Forgiveness Necessary for Your Cheating Wife?
It is crucial that you forgive your wife for cheating because it paves the way for you to forgive yourself for your perceived responsibility in her cheating. You can't really forgive yourself until you've forgiven her first. It's a twisty, turning, and very rocky road to happily ever after. Trust me.
As convoluted as it sounds, it's true. You can't really forgive yourself until you forgive her and until you've done both, your relationship can't move forward. No one wants a marriage that's stuck in limbo. You're both better served by learning the true power of forgiveness early and well.
What does Forgiving her Involve?
Forgiveness is the act of letting go of the anger associated with an act or deed. When you forgive your wife for cheating, you've let go of your answer over her cheating. It's not a get out of jail free card and it certainly isn't a free pass for her to go out and do it again.
It's your way of acknowledging that you want the relationship to move forward rather than getting bogged down and stuck in her past act of cheating. It doesn't mean you'll forgive her for the same thing again (and you need to make this very clear to her). But it is a commitment by you not to bring up her cheating past every time the two of you have an argument or disagreement. It's not fodder for a war between the two of you that is sure to take prisoners and bring a few casualties.
Can you save your marriage without forgiving your wife for cheating? It's doubtful that doing so would be possible. Marriage isn't about keeping score. It's about love. Plain and simple. Forgiveness is just one way to express that love but one that is vital.
Do You Have to Forgive Your Wife for Cheating to Save Your Marriage?