Don't Let Your Sadness Ruin Your Life
I'm not saying that stress and depression are figments of your imagination
. Anyone who has ever felt alone or hopeless would be able to assure you that the feelings are real. It is just that coping with these feelings can be harder because of the things that go on in your mind.
We used to have a next door neighbor who lived in her big house by herself. She didn't drive, and she never went anywhere. I don't know how she got her groceries or did anything she had to do with the outside world. I saw her in her back yard occasionally, but other than those rare sightings, she spent most of her life in her living room.
She wasn't a bad person. When my siblings or I had something to sell for school, she would make her contribution. She showed me plants in her yard because they were very interesting. But, the life she lived in her head was much more exciting and dangerous than anyone in our small town could conjure from reality.
"I wish those boys across the street would quit harassing me," she would complain to my mother.
"Have you ever heard so much fighting?" she would ask, pointing to our neighbor's house on the other side.
The boys she thought were cat calling to her had grown up and moved away years ago. The other neighbors lived closer to us than they did to her, and we never heard a peep out of them. To our neighbor, however, the things she complained about were as real as the blue sky above was to the rest of us.
Fortunately, most of us don't get paranoid when we're blue. However, prolonged states of sadness can make the world seem a lot more hostile than it is. This is why it is so important to learn how to deal with occasional bouts of depression effectively before they develop into long term mental health issues. Here are some suggestions that might help:
1. Don't stay alone. Join church groups, clubs or civic groups so that you are in contact with other humans. It may be awhile before strong enough bonds are created to become satisfying friendships, but getting out of the house will lend you perspective on the world, and give you a chance to see your life in a new, and hopefully brighter light. If you give yourself and the other people you meet a chance, you will find that relationships develop, and that eventually you will have friends to keep your thoughts warm and happy.
2. Adopt a dog or cat. Your pet won't share your taste in music and poetry, but you couldn't ask for a more loving companion. Animals are not two faced about their affections. They appreciate food and attention, and will recipricate your love with a warm enthusiasm that is bound to chase your blues away. Besides, a dog or cat isn't going to fight you for the last piece of pizza if you keep it out of their reach, or argue about what to watch on TV.
3. Expand your knowledge. Read a book or take a class on a subject you've always wanted to explore. Surf the net, and read information that you've always wanted to have. Maybe there is a class in your area that you would enjoy. If you fill your brain with new thoughts, it won't have room to aggravate you about the things that make you unhappy.,
If your sadness is more than the blues, or temporary depression, don't hesitate to go for professional help. A person trained in mental health issues can help you deal with your sadness, even if you know what is causing it. Depression is no more shameful than diabetes or cancer are. You should always feel free to get the help you need. You are entitled to a happy life, and should never accept it when your peace of mind is being destroyed by feelings of hopelessness.
Copyright (c) 2010 Lucille Uttermohlen
by: Lucille Uttermohlen
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