How to Build That Bridge Over Troubled Waters and Save Your Marriage

How to Build That Bridge Over Troubled Waters and Save Your Marriage

No marriage worth its name is without the usual turbulence. Couples, who boast that their marriage has been one continuous honeymoon, are either lying or are not sensitive enough to even realize the simmering undercurrents that are as inevitable as tomorrow. Come to think of it, a marriage can not be termed 'happy' unless there is a tiff now and then, a little misunderstanding over small issues, etc. But if there are more tiffs than happy times, then it is time to build that bridge over troubled waters to save your marriage. Remember a marriage neglected, is a marriage ruined.

However, you cannot do anything to save your marriage, unless you know the areas that are causing tension between the two of you. It could be something that is 'silly and insignificant' but that is only your version. Your spouse could be thinking otherwise. To avoid having parallel views, it is better to critically analyze your own situation and look for some tell-tale signs of a neglected marriage, in order to save your marriage and build a stronger bridge to strengthen the relationship:

Are your priorities same? Is your spouse spending more time at the golf course or at the shopping mall? When two people in a marriage have separate and engulfing priorities, it shows. Sporadic communication, children ignored, separate friends' circle, different agenda, lack of time for each other, are some the after-effects of different priorities. It has a high-speed snow-balling effect, which can ruin an otherwise perfect marriage. A glowing example is when one or both partners are workaholics. Therefore, to save your marriage, before it gets out of hand, discuss the matter frankly with your spouse and come to a mutually acceptable solution.

Limit your distractions. It is always possible to have your attention divided amongst several things that you are committed to do. But trouble starts when the distractions are too many and happen too often. Apart from being stressful, the togetherness goes for a six and the marriage seems to be another marriage of convenience more than anything else. Ignored, this too can further the distance between the two of you. Take your spouse into confidence, and talk matters out. To save your marriage, you might have to take the initiative to schedule some exclusive time which both of you should spend together without any interruption from any other source.

When did you last spend some quality time together? This requires some deep introspection as this could hold the key to your troubled marriage. Remember though, that many people are insensitive to this intrinsic necessity. Therefore to save your marriage, and in your own interest, you could devise some ways by which you force your spouse to go for a vacation, go for a cozy dinner or simply go for a romantic walk in the woods. You would be surprised, what this little togetherness can do to help you build that bridge over troubled waters.

A bit of pretense helps to save your marriage. Though it may seem to be a Herculean task to take a renewed interest in what your spouse does or what makes him or her tick - but a wee bit of effort can rekindle that lost spirit of love between the two of you. Small gestures of encouragement or gratitude can go a long way in clearing misunderstandings and many misgivings which widen the gap in a relationship. However, this is not a one-time activity. If you sincerely want to save your marriage, you have to be consistent in your efforts so that your sincerity shows. After all, love is a good cause to walk that extra mile.

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