How to Fix the Problems in Your Relationship without Putting Your Man on the Offensive
Author: Teecee Go
Author: Teecee Go
Has the relationship that seemed destined for marriage suddenly taken a 180-degree turn for the worse? Sure, you had a few disagreements but thats no reason to question your commitment to each other, right? Sadly, many relationships that experience these bumps in the road dont survive. The bumps are never smoothed over and eventually they become mountains that cant be overcome. How did these small obstacles become such big problems in your relationship? You tried everything in your power to fix them but they never seemed to actually go away. Believe it or not, they became detrimental as soon as you began trying to fix them. There is no exact science to relationships. You cant methodically identify problems, formulate solutions and execute resolutions in a relationship. The challenges that present themselves are a result of two persons co-existing instead of working together. Your first reaction when you see a problem brewing is to tell your man about the problem and fix it immediately before it grows into enormous proportions. A worse scenario is when you look to your man to fix it. Men and women see things in a very different light. You may see the problem lies within him; he will see the problem lies within the relationship. He wont go into fix-it mode; he will go into insecure mode. From that point on, he will begin to question the relationship, not the problem. How do you stop him from questioning the relationship instead of the problem? Its all in the approach. Approach your problem as a new challenge for the relationship. Bring it to light, but keep its severity in perspective. If you see it as an enormous problem you will treat it as such and put some major strain on the relationship. Dont make mountains out of speed bumps. Dont constantly remind him theres a problem; it will only make the situation worse. Look at your challenges from all sides to see if you are actually part of the problem. When you look at it from different angles, you will be better able to see a solution. You cant fix everything by yourself. You can bring it to light and let him decide if there is a problem. Go back into loving relationship mode and let him participate in the solution. If he really loves you, he will correct the problem himself. Remember to keep your lines of communication open and honest. Express your thoughts and emotions in a manner that allows him to participate with ease. If he values your relationship, he will be open to conquering new challenges because he will view you as worth the effort.About the Author:
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