Is My Marriage Over? Why You Shouldn't Give Up Just Yet
Is My Marriage Over? Why You Shouldn't Give Up Just Yet
Is my marriage over? You hate that you even have to consider this question right now. Somewhere along the way your relationship with your spouse went from satisfying and comforting to strained and confusing. You seriously don't know what to do anymore. You love them but you're growing weary of all the conflict and tension between the two of you. Marriage isn't easy and unfortunately we don't fully grasp that concept before we take our vows. If you're feeling unsure about what your future holds, don't be too quick to jump on the divorce wagon. When a couple still feels love for one another they owe it to themselves and their family to try and rebuild the relationship one last time.
When you're asking yourself the question, "is my marriage over," consider what your life would be like if your spouse wasn't there anymore. The idea of divorce or separation can be terribly appealing until you realize that it means you won't share any time with your spouse in the future. You can't talk to them about decisions you'll be making and they won't be there to add friendship and companionship to your life. Also, think long and hard about how you feel about the idea of your spouse falling in love and building a life with another person. If any of this causes you emotional pain, leaving your marriage may not be what you need right now.
Sometimes a couple reaches a point where they feel their marriage is over because they just don't communicate about anything of substance anymore. All they talk about is the necessities. Things like what the children need or if the bills are paid monopolize their conversations. They never address what each other is feeling and over time it becomes harder and harder to re-introduce those things back into the conversations. Making an effort to talk about the relationship and what's happening with it can start a couple back on the path towards reconnecting.
Before you throw in the white flag of defeat on your marriage, consider giving it one last try. Talk to your spouse about what you feel you two need to work on and express why you believe the marriage is worth saving. You may be surprised to learn that they feel exactly the same way about the future as you do and you can then both work harder at rebuilding the bond and creating an even more satisfying marriage than you've had in the past.