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Learning About Gay Tantra

Tantra, a Sanskrit word means to weave, expand

, spread or connect. In gay tantra the couple aims to use their opposing flows of energy to reach a deeper connection and level of spirituality. Although many people believe the process is not possible for same sex couples, the increasing numbers of people getting involved shows otherwise. The appeal for many couples is the opportunity provided to become closer and obtain a more complete understanding of their personalities.

Many couples are drawn to tantra because it has a reputation for encouraging intimacy and prolonging and intensifying climax. These are not the only benefits. For the individual the process can help them come to terms with parts of their personality they were not comfortable with before. Tantra aims to help people develop spirituality, openness, shed fear and guilt and expand their boundaries to lead a more fulfilling life. Therefore it is a system of spiritual and personal development which utilizes the sexual energies.

The theories which are called tantra come from all over Asia and are built on ancient traditions from Hinduism and Buddhism. Therefore practices can vary a lot between different teachers.

Some traditions of tantra assert that the practice is not possible for same sex couples because the opposing male and female energies are needed. However there are several schools which include gay tantra. Techniques which use the theories of Kundalini energy flows are possible for same sex couples. This is because in Kundalini the rising energy flows are the same in all people regardless of sexual preference or gender. Some traditions use a lot of visualization in their processes. In these cases partners can imagine themselves as being of different sexes when guiding the flows of energy. Sexual preference is viewed as a personality trait in Buddhism and is therefore unimportant in the context of tantra.


Tantric Buddhism was created by a Buddha and his companion Big SkyDancer. The followers of this school of tantra were known for being particularly passionate and devoted to the spiritual path. It was developed by a Frenchwoman called Margot Anand Naslednikoy in the eighties. Her system, called Sky Dancer Tantra is now the most widespread type of gay tantric yoga. It is based on the concept of love as a dance in the sky.


Meditation is a common practice in tantra. It aids relaxation, visualization and connection to the spiritual realms. Many people start with taking alternate breaths while sitting face to face. Yoga positions are often used and yoga is also popular due to its focus on breathing. Visualization is used in two ways; to imagine Deities and spiritual entities and also to visualize the transference of energy between the two bodies.

Another popular way to enjoy tantra is tantric massage. The aim of the therapy is to unblock energy flows just as in other forms of massage. However in tantric massage the therapist uses touch and pressure to build up sexual energy. Then the force of this energy is used to release pressure. This massage is not intended to cause climax but that is always a possibility and is viewed as acceptable.

For those who want to learn more about gay tantra there are many retreats, workshops and gurus available. It is easy to find details of these online. Increasing numbers of same sex couples and single gay people are starting to practice gay tantra. There are a range of methods but the main aim is personal development.

by: Howie Holben.
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