Mr. Ruff And Tuff Asks, "how Can I Save My Marriage?"

Jake was rough, tough, crude and rude; but he was in love with his wife

. "She used to have the hots for me, you know?" he said. "She loved that I was a bad boy."

"Were you really a bad boy?" I asked.

"Yea, in a way. I don't do it no more, but I was into drugs - selling them, not using them. But I talked rough, you know? I never hit Karen or nothin'. I don't believe in hitting women.

The reality was that it was not going to difficult to improve things for Karen and Jake. It was just going to take time. Karen loved him dearly but she had a very different upbringing than his. Politeness, good manners, even being genteel, were part of it, and finally, Jake's "low class" behavior had gotten to her. She wished...

Wished what? That her frog could become a prince? Exactly. But that was not going to happen. Yet, there was a lot that Jake could do so he could save his marriage. Fortunately, Karen didn't feel it was necessary to change him completely - to make him like her family. She could accept that he wasn't educated. There were just some key things that really bothered her.

The man was a willing learner, which was a bit surprising since he wasn't open to anyone changing him. His love for his wife was enough motivation for him to accept that he needed to change. We can't say that Jake is the ultimate gentleman today, but he made changes in many of the places that Karen wanted. He made up for his shortcomings by changing in the ways he could.

He made up for his shortcomings by changing in the ways he could. It was the understanding that something's you can change and something's you have to learn to live with that helped them. Karen says that she now has much more of a gentleman than she had before. "I am so proud of him," she says, "and I love him more than ever for being willing to change a lot of things for me."

Why is being a gentleman important? 1. Gentlemanliness is sexiness. Treating a woman like a Lady will woo her faster than any other tactic. 2. Gentlemen do not act like jerks. A jerk doesn't care what anyone thinks about him. He behaves like a jerk because once a man slips into crass behavior, and he gets used to being low class, it becomes a habit. A woman with a jerk has lowered the bar so much that she will accept any bad behavior just to keep a man. Such a couple's desire to please each other deteriorates into fighting and disrespect. 3. Girls choose men that are like their fathers. Be a good role model for your daughter. If a girl insists that her dates behave like gentlemen, she'll draw a higher class of man and that may be the ingredient that saves her marriage. If your daughter is bringing home jerks you are doing something wrong.

My (Margaret's) father made very little money and spent his life in blue collar work, because he had very little education. He was a man's man, but he always was a gentleman in the presence of his family, ladies and others. His behavior is what I came to expect and demand from boyfriends and that is just what I got in a husband. 4. Gentlemen are more successful. People don't always know why such a man is special. They just know he is.

Gentlemen are more successful. People don't always know why such a man is special. Their grace and sincerity are obvious. I am proud that my husband was an Officer in the Marines. These men were taught to be very tough but they were expected to be gentlemen with ladies. I know that you, just like me, want a marriage that keeps you safe and secure. Gentlemanliness is a marriage safeguard. We give you practical ways to be a gentleman in our books and save-your-marriage material at www.loverelationshipheadquarters.com.

Margaret Hardisty International Best Selling Author and Speaker Love Relationship Headquarters www.loverelationshipheadquarters.com

by: Margaret Hardisty

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