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One Customer's Summary Of Answer Services

After having several experiences with various call centers and company help centers

, this is one person's response, when asked to review the process. Perhaps you've felt something similar. If you are an answer service provider, is this the type of response you want? What are your customers telling their friends about your company?

A Telling Reaction

Q: How would you describe what call centers do?

A: Most people believe that when they call into a customer support line, they're being connected to magical elves whose only pleasure is to make their every wish come true.


Q: That's a bit sarcastic. How would you describe it to other people?

A: Fine. With the ever accelerating march of technology, the average consumer expects more and more of the businesses they work with. Luckily, through new computer software programs, call centers are able to perform more and more services for customer satisfaction than ever before!

Q: What services do they provide? What was your experience like?

A: Well, when you call in to a customer service line, it's unlikely that the person on the other end picks up a physical phone anymore. More likely than not, the representative you're talking to was working on other projects for the company, such as data entry. They were listening to the radio on their headsets, but when they hear the chirping (or beeping, or ringing) indicating that they have an incoming call, they quickly scramble to hit the pause button on their sizzling tunes, open up their call center UI, and click on a virtual button to answer your call.

Many companies artificially inflate their apparent size by having several menu options when you call in. It helps build confidence in the customer when their menu options allow them to select sales, marketing, product orders, and shipping, because they think their selection will actually take them to a different place where a specialist can meet their needs. In fact, all of these options take them to a disoriented person named Joe who is probably playing Sudoku while explaining the company's warranty policy to you.

Q: I see. It sounds like you haven't had..the best experience. Do you think you'll ever use, or recommend someone else to use, answering service in the future?

A: Really, computers have been replacing telephones under your radar anyway. The iPhone is little more than a computer that (kind of) makes phone calls. Smart phones are computers imitating the iPhone. Computers have been making inroads into the phone business for years now, and we can only hope that once they've completely conquered our communications arrays, that humanity will be allowed to live in their robotic utopia.

Q: So... would you say we even need call centers?

A: Let's face it: [as the owner of a company,] you're paid too much to talk to the peasants who are interested in your product. The truth is, you can't afford not to have a call center. It's like an enormous evolving brain whose only interest is to serve you. Have you ever wanted your own Cerebrus? It's a lot like that. Call centers not only serve as a sort of mental Labyrinth in which your irate customers can get stalled before they manage to muss things up, but at a moment's notice, you can switch your minion into attack mode, and start performing outbound calls. The world will watch in horror as your creature shoots out countless marketing tentacles, seizing the world and drawing it into the infinite power of your dark empire.


Q: Okay, I see. Well, thank you for your input.

Conclusion:

I disagree with a lot of what my interviewee said, but it does show what happens when people have bad experiences with customer service. The good news is that if a company provides a quality experience, their efforts are repaid when customers post about it on the web, and word is spread that your company is one worth visiting.

by: Sagbee
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