Planning An Interfaith Wedding Ceremony by:Ruth Purple
With the boom in the online dating industry, more and more singles end up in a relationship
with someone from as far as the other end of the globe, with an entirely different culture and yes, religion. Although interracial dating is very common nowadays, it can still create some amount of tension between the couple's families, especially with the conservative types. Even if there are a lot of interracial couples whose relationship seems to work out just fine, setting aside the differences in religion is not as easy as we often think. Interracial couples who are dead-set on traipsing down the aisle must be aware that their different faiths can (and will!) create tension that will surely reverberate through their respective families and make waves during the wedding.
This is something that must be faced head on, and needs some compromises from both parties. Planning an interfaith wedding ceremony can be quite hard, so here are some ways to make it work no matter how many Gods each of you may have: It is likely that the couple have already been dating for some time (unless she is a mail-order bride), therefore an open discussion about each of your spiritual beliefs and how they differ is absolutely necessary. The role of religious faith in your future household must be determined, especially if there will be kids in the future, and building a home together requires certain traditions and beliefs to play a major role.
Finding an officiant for an interfaith wedding can be a bit complicated, since some religious officials still feel uncomfortable performing an interfaith ceremony. It is important to make time for some sit down sessions with the officiant well before the wedding, and name the specific religious aspects of the ceremony that either of you might want to include. But, before doing so, make sure that you and your fiance have thoroughly discussed this, making clear their significance to each of you. Have several options, and select the one that would work best not only for the two of you but also for both sides of the family.
There are some cases, however, when one partner's religious background would appeal to the other, so the partner would simply convert. If your future spouse is willing to do it, try to be supportive and look for an officiant who will guide him/her through the steps of religious conversion. Sometimes a conversion can cause a rift between families, so let him/her know that it is not necessary to turn his/her back on the familyhe/she can still celebrate Christmas at his/her parent's home even if you have both embraced the Muslim faith. In order to make an interfaith wedding work, it may require the officiant to have a spiritual but non-specific ceremony.
Find one who has performed many interfaith marriages. This way, the ceremony can be done in such a way that obvious elements of a particular tradition are avoided. Instead, the rites and rituals that are identified with each religion can be fused, so as to create a reference to the fact that the specific ritual is common to both. If the official knows how to veer from tension-building situations, the ceremony will be focused more on its true essence, which is the union of two people in love. And lastly, getting the parents involved may just save the day. If both parties have equal involvement in the areas of the wedding that are essential to them, they may be more open and at ease in embracing the idea of "meeting in the middle".
About the author
The author of this article Ruth Purple is a Relationships Coach who has been successfully coaching and guiding clients for many years. Ruth recently decided to go public and share her knowledge and experience through her website
http://www.relazine.com. You can sign up for her free newsletter and join her coaching program.
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