Portly Pudgy Plumpers Prevented From Riding At Potter Park
"Harry Potter and the Forbidden Journey" is one of the most modern
theme park rides in the world.
That being said, if you're a tad tubby, a smidgen stout, a bit
blimpy, if you suffer from cellular corpulence, or an overabundance
of oleaginous obesity...then you'd better not try and get on the
flagship ride of the Wizarding World of Harry Potter.
As one person put it, "If you're a plus size person, you're not
going to fit in the car." This has no doubt disappointed a number of
large Harry Potter fans. Universal, which owns the theme park, has
some big seats in some of its rides, but not at the Potter Park.
Potter Park is not for the portly, or potbellied. I guess that would
include bulky butterballs, husky heavies and mammoth massive
monsters. Believe it or not...they actually have employees that
perform "random" screenings, where they ask potential passengers to
sit in a test seat in order to kick them out of line before they
actually arrive at the ride itself.
It probably goes something like this: "Yo lardass...park your
immense ass in the seat here...so we can test the safety restraint."
The park says that they don't want anyone to get stuck in a ride.
I once saw a 400 pound woman (and my estimate of the poundage might
be low) get stuck in a restaurant booth. The restaurant owner had to
call the fire department and they had to pull the table top out of
the wall to get her out. From then on, no one in the restaurant was
allowed to seat any bigguns...except at an open table.
Potter Park must have been designed by a rail thin British chap. Any
average American engineer could have told you that you were going to
need some seriously surplus seats on a theme park ride. Or anywhere
else the American public is being asked to go.
Here at Dr. Bill's Favorite Formulas, we don't discriminate. A
couple of us here have been guilty of carrying too much flab in the
past. We know what it feels like to get called fat, because we were,
in fact, overweight. No one would ever accuse us of being Calvin
Klein models. But we're probably not going to get kicked out of the
Harry Potter ride line. (At least, not now.)
What you want to be is a Fit Focker, not a Pudgy Plumper. The best
way to get there is to get started on pharmaceutical grade fish oil,
start exercising and start eating right. The best time to do that is
... right now.
by: Dr.Bill
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