Relationship Advice for Men Who Don't Feel Understood
Relationship Advice for Men Who Don't Feel Understood
By Otto Collins
To Eli, his girlfriend Kate seems to be from a completely different planet-- or maybe a different universe! She doesn't get where he's coming from.
Whenever Eli tries to be supportive or do something nice for her, Kate takes it the wrong way. And when Eli wants her to give him support, forget it. She either gives advice when he just wants her to listen or she is too distracted to notice that he's going through some tough stuff.
It's clear to Eli that Kate does not understand him.
Does it seem to you that the gulf of understanding between yourself and your woman is wide, deep and treacherous?
When you're in a love relationship or marriage, it's important that you feel understood. In fact, when one or both of you do not feel like your partner gets who you are and what you need, distance and tension can arise.
While every person approaches life and love from a unique perspective, it is possible to come to place of mutual understanding.
Your partner might not always agree with you, but you would probably like to feel that she respects your way of living your life and being in a relationship with her.
A first step to being understood by your woman...
Too often we get frustrated and angry with our partner because she doesn't understand where we are coming from on a particular issue. The trouble is, when we look a little deeper, it sometimes turns out that we don't actually understand our own position.
Start out by making sure you understand your own self.
When you are conflicted or at odds with the decisions you've made or the direction that you're going, it only adds to the confusion and disconnection in your relationship.
If it seems to you that your woman just doesn't understand you, take a step back and ask yourself if you are wishy-washy or split about whatever the subject is.
If you discover that you are, take the time to become clear.
Your next step is to be honest and up-front with your partner about how you feel and what you want-- even if you know she sees things differently.
You two can actually move closer together, experience fewer disagreements and less tension when you each know what you want and need in your relationship and life-- even if you don't agree.
From this place of more openness and honesty, you can start to understand one another more fully.