Social Circle Mastery Revealing The Social Matrix
Before I get into some of the specifics, I want to reassure you that before Love Systems I was not naturally great at social situations
. I was never the popular guy in school and my social life since then wasnt a whirlwind of activity. Braddocks story is slightly different (and hopefully we can get him to tell it in an upcoming LSi) but the point is that you dont have to be one of the naturally socially powerful people to succeed with Social Circle Mastery.
Having Social Circle Mastery means that you have the lifestyle, the friends, the connections, the access to people/places/parties/events and the hot women in your social circle. Beautiful women should be plentiful, abundant and dying to be a part of your Social Circle and your life. It is a social magnetism towards your life. It also means having the ability to seduce women like a rockstar through this social circle.
The Basics: Social Dead Ends and Two Types of Connectors
Lets begin with basics, the building blocks that will help with the more advanced Social Circle Mastery concepts. First, lets define two terms or different types of people: social dead ends and connectors. A social dead end is someone who adds no value to your life and generally brings you down usually through things like negativity, inability to progress, or disinterest in evolving as a person. Many people who go through our exercises at the beginning of our Social Circle Mastery seminar recognize some of these behaviors in themselves. Human beings are imperfect.
A connector (our use of this term is inspired by Malcolm Gladwell in The Tipping Point, though obviously weve changed it to apply to dating science instead of to societal trends). There are actually a couple of different kinds of connector. A social connector is someone who has a particular and rare set of social skills. They belong in multiple social circles and introduce people to other people all the time.
A value connector is a bit different. Such a person may be social and is likely to be but it doesnt matter if s/he is a recluse. A value connector has access to scarce resources, where a social connector only has access to different social networks. A value connector may be a doorman or promoter who can get you into a hot venue. S/he might have access to parties, events, premieres, famous people, and so on. This gives you value as well, one step removed. Remember in Chapter 7 of Magic Bullets when Savoy goes through the eight qualities that are universally attractive to women, and how the book shows how can you demonstrate Status (one of the qualities) through your Social Circle as well as through yourself? Thats what were building off of here. Some people are both social connectors and value connectors.
Of course, were not talking about using people or a mercenary approach to friendship. Most connectors are interesting, positive and passionate people who inspire others around them. Surrounding yourself with high-value people will motivate you to make the best of your life as opposed to surrounding yourself with people whose own failings, insecurities and need to protect their ego justifies settling for the familiar and the Routine. To paraphrase Napoleon Hill in his book Think and Grow Rich, when you hang around people who are excellent, you become excellent yourself.
The Structure of Your Social Life: the power of fifteen
Most peoples social lives can be mapped to a series of concentric circles. There is an innermost core of one or two close friends. Then comes an inner core of another 3-5 people and an outer core of another 5-15 people. These arent arbitrary numbers this is how the human mind subconsciously qualifies social relationships. Doing both the academic and the real-world research to come with that was a pain, but its an important concept. The people in these cores comprise of the people who most influence your life. It has been said that you are the average of the 5 people that you hang around the most. This is partially true, but it is more accurate to say that most people are influenced by up to 15 people at a time, as different relationships ebb and flow in intensity.
Managing your core is crucial. Your objective should be to fill your core as much as possible with connectors. They should bring value to you and you need to bring value to them.
This will have an immediate impact on your dating life, whether or not you go for 10s. One of the insights from Magic Bullets is that women will judge you based on your friends. This is true for one night stands (if you are around fun, cool people and are the life of the party, you are immediately more attractive) and even more for longer-term relationships, since most women are interested in the social life and opportunities that you bring her to. A lot of this immediate effect dimension builds off of the great interview that Savoy and The Don did on Advanced Winging (download it now on Seductioninfo its one of the best interviews in the series and if you ever go out with a wingman, it will improve both of your results immediately).
Taking it one step further, your social network should not only be attractive to women, but also be a source of beautiful women into your life. This is something we cover in detail in the Social Circle Mastery seminars and will figure prominently in future articles.
On a more advanced level, when you are introduced through friends to other friends, your pre-existing alliances often determine your social value and your relative value to the person to which you are being introduced. Dont go saying I dont want to play that game. Beautiful women are hyper-conscious of social value.
The key principle about your core is to bring value to peoples lives and they will bring value to yours. Be a connector and have other connectors in your life. If all the slots in your top fifteen are filled with negative people who dont offer value or exhibit forward momentum in their own lives, then you might need to reassess the role that they play in yours. You can have friends you like and care about who dont help you meet your goals in life, but these should not be the only friends you have.
Your top three cores (the approximately 15 most present people in your life) determine your social success in terms of (a) social status (b) life orientation and (c) at least some degree life success. You cant expect to fill these spaces with people who cant help you reach your goals and then complain that these goals are out of reach.
Social Trees
The last concept I want to define in this article is that of Social Trees. Everyone is part of a number of different social trees. Examples of where social trees arise include your workplace, your school, the guys that you go out with, your yoga class etc. Social trees are relative in value to you and to each other. For example, having a high position on a certain low value social tree (e.g. the leader of two geeky guys who each have no friends) is not as socially valuable as having a low position on a high-value social tree (e.g., the celebrity hanger-on who occasionally gets to sleep with beautiful fans). That being said, it is always advisable to be amongst the top of one tree. One practical use of this is on dates, which we often plan so that she can see you in a social environment in which youre up at the top of the social tree (e.g., youre throwing a party, so you invite her to come with you). You shouldnt have to re-read Magic Bullets to know how powerful an effect that social status has on women.
Understanding trees is understanding social dynamics, and our techniques for tree climbing (becoming the alpha mate of trees), tree jumping (how to switch trees) and merging trees are part of the magic of Social Circle Mastery and we should touch on these in future articles.
Initial Insights
The goal of this article is to introduce the concept of connectors, dead ends, cores, and trees. With that as a foundation, we can get into some of the more insights and strategies for Social Circle Mastery (or when you come take the seminar, you will be able to hit the ground running from the first minute). Additionally, I wanted you to think of Social Circles as something you can manage, indeed master, as opposed to taking a purely passive approach about who ends up in your life.
As an exercise, Id like you to think about your social relationships in terms of cores and trees. Map them out on paper. Ask yourself who is a social connector, who is a value connector (some people may be both) and who is a dead end. What is missing from your social life? Who might you want to cultivate? Are you bringing value to the connectors in your life?
Just by asking yourself these sorts of questions, you will already be taking a giant leap forward over most men.
by: Dale C. Nieto
Cash Gifting Mastery - Avoid This Prospect Repelling Act At All Costs 000-n13 Ibm Intelligent Operations Center Technical Mastery Test V1 000-r14 Ibm Surepos 500 Models 5x5 Technical Mastery Exam Test 000-n13: Ibm Intelligent Operations Center Technical Mastery Test V1 Test 000-n15: Ibm Ioc Intelligent Water Technical Mastery Test V1 Test 000-n16: Ibm Ioc Intelligent Transportation Technical Mastery Test V1 Test 000-n17:ibm B2b Integration Saas Technical Mastery Test V1 Cash Gifting Mastery - 6 Quick Tips For Mastering Phone Fear Now 000-n13: Ibm Intelligent Operations Center Technical Mastery Test V1 Test R14: Ibm Surepos 500 Series Models 5x5 Technical Mastery 000-n17: Ibm B2b Integration Saas Technical Mastery Test V1 Cash Gifting Mastery - 11 Tips To Convert Your Email List Quickly Cash Gifting Mastery - 10 Tips For Quickly Doubling Your Retweets