Stopping Your Divorce - May Not Be Worth the While!

Stopping Your Divorce - May Not Be Worth the While!

So your spouse has deserted you and now demands divorce. This is despite the long association, despite the kids, despite your health and despite you not doing anything drastically 'wrong'. Be that as it may, you are keen to get back your spouse but as far as stopping your divorce is concerned, you are clueless as to where to begin and how to go about the whole exercise.

Before you start to make plans for stopping your divorce, here are some pointers, which might trigger some thoughts as well as action steps:

- Why exactly are you thinking about stopping your divorce? You have to answer this question as frankly as possible. Stop believing in the concept of 'love' at this point in time, since it is presumed that there ought to have been love in the first place and somehow you lost it.

- Do the reasons for stopping your divorce include small and helpless children? Do your need your spouse back to take care of you and your illness? Or is the reason linked to money and you need monetary assistance to live the lifestyle you are used to? Frank and honest answers to such questions may reveal a lot of home-truths which may be closely linked to hypocrisy on your part. If there is any particular reason why you are keen in stopping your divorce, remember there is always a way out of the situation, if you have the will to carry out your decision that is.

- It could well be the fact that the huge financial implication involved in case you are divorced is the basic reason for stopping your divorce. If this is the case with you, think again; is there any point in stopping your divorce and starting to live with the same person all over again when there is no question of any future compatibility whether physical or mental?

- Think what lies ahead once you are successful in stopping your divorce. You get back your spouse, back on the same bed, holding you with the same arms. But is the person inside the same? Can all the bitterness that preceded the divorce decision ever be forgiven and forgotten? Remember it takes a second to break a relationship but a lifetime to build it.

- Can your efforts of bring back your spouse ever be able to bring back that same spirit of joy and togetherness that you enjoyed during the phase when your spouse did not have any problems with you? If there is solid ground for your spouse to ask for the divorce, why not respect it and forget and move on? Of course it is easier said than done, but with time, anything is possible.

Before you plan out your course of action in stopping your divorce, think that more than the physical entity, you are trying to establish a renewed relationship with a mind - that was till recently, full of bitterness, anger, disappointment, resentment and perhaps even hatred. Think twice before you jump to any decision.

But, on the flip side, there are many couples who have been able to successfully pick up all the broken pieces and live a happy life together. It might be true in your case. If you think that your marriage is worth of saving and fighting for... you should do it!

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