Surviving a Break-up
Not surprisingly your relationship has come to an end
. And even though you fought a lot and things were not as they should have been, you are still in shock. So how do you go about surviving a break-up? Here are a few secrets to surviving a break-up;
1. Keep breathing! They just dropped the bomb and your world is falling apart right before you. There is a pain in your heart that is threatening to kill you, it's not a heart attack, breathe in and out. Sadness should not kill you; no person is worth that much. Surviving a break-up requires that you know that this is not the worst situation ever and like all things, it too will pass.
2. Out of sight, out of mind policy! The initial stages of a break-up are accompanied by denial. You cannot stop texting, calling and e-mailing him even though you know that it's a dead end for both of you. As long as you have his number in your phone-book you will keep calling, erase it. Unfortunately the digits are embedded in your memory and so you still know it by heart. Do not panic, one step at a time, with time you will manage to completely forget it. If not, the fact that it's not on your phone will constantly remind you that it is no longer for your use. Block him from accessing your face book profile, erase his e-mails and as for his personal belongings which are still with you, make sure he gets them back. You do not want his stuff stirring memories of him. I would not advise you to give back the presents that he got for you but for now you could put them in a safe box and use them later when the pain has reduced or is all gone.
3. Acceptance! This is critical to surviving
a break-up. He is not coming back and the pain is unending. Do not fight the urge to break down and cry. Just let it out, the sooner you are able to do this the nearer you are to recovery road. Indulge in those cravings of ice cream, sweets and junk food but don't overdo it as you don't want to get stuck at this food stage where overeating becomes your solution to all your pains and discomforts. Take some time off from your normal schedule and release the anger and pain. Watch that movie that makes you cry like a small baby, listen to some slow sad music and call up that friend that always thinks it is okay to cry your heart out.
4. Spoil yourself! It has been a month since you parted ways. To survive a break-up you must get up from that couch and stop feeling sorry for yourself. Go out shopping and change your wardrobe. Visit the spa and let that massage do you wonders. Go for a vacation and take your mind off him. You think it is expensive? Well that's true but an emotionally stable you is the best gift that you can give to yourself and you deserve it.
5. Repair your ego! Getting back into the dating scene quickly can give you a quick fix to fill up the emptiness in your heart but this could mean rejection which is normal in the dating scene. Are you prepared for this? You are vulnerable and this could be destructive to the healing process. Make new friends, have fun and trim your body without focusing on one guy. This will boost your confidence which will make dating easier for you.
6. Get a purpose in life! Do not misquote me; he was a very important part in your life. However, that is in your past and to survive a break-up you must now focus on your present and future. Get busy and balance your life. Analyze what makes life lighter for you and sends happy chills down your spine. Your talents and hobbies cannot fail you. As a matter of fact, pursue a new hobby to make your life more interesting. Meet new friends, venture into new chat rooms and take up dance classes. You will not only forget him but you will reward yourself by improving your life.
7. Optimism! Dating is a process of understanding yourself and your likes and dislikes; and so from time to time you will dump someone or be on the receiving end. You cannot become hateful if it happens to you; it is part of living life to the full. Be warm to people, break-ups should not dictate how you relate to other people. Surviving a break-up means that you must move on with other friends knowing that you were an important part of his life in the past but these new friends and your present and future.
8. Fall in love again! As time passes and the pain has slowly faded away, it's time to get back into the game. A new flame will make you forget the old one, if and only if you have completely healed. Let go and trust someone else to love you again. However, do not get carried away by this new feeling, like I said, dating is a cycle and things might not work out, you could find yourself back to being heartbroken.
If you can successfully go through a break-up without getting stuck at any step then you have learn t an important life lesson. That you can handle anything and that you are not a victim in life!
Surviving a Break-up
By: Rosy Anderson
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