Thank you, but NO thank you

Thank you, but NO thank you

Thank you, but NO thank you

Why is it so difficult to say NO to people? Are you constantly asked by your boss to do an extra task, but you really don't have the time. Does your friend ask you to babysit her extremely annoying 9 year old yet again on a Saturday night and however loud the little voice in your head is saying "JUST SAY NO", what actually comes out of your mouth is.... "Yes no problem!....(Darn it!)"

If this sounds anything like you and you find it difficult to say no, then you might benefit from some tips on how to be more assertive or even how to use some visual techniques to make it less likely of getting asked to do something.

When I am at work nothing says do not disturb better than having your headphones on, this might seem too good to be true but seriously headphones work. If you don't have an I-pod or other music device just pretend!

Similarly, if you are in a public place and are just not in the mood to participate and want some me' time simply get a book out and get engrossed, most people agree that it is rude to interrupt someone who is reading.

If you use an electronic diary which your work colleague can check, or you have instant messenger at work make sure you block out time in your diary so that people can't sneak a meeting in there and make sure your status is set to do not disturb. This is simple but effective.

Be more assertive. This is easier said than done, but it does get easier with practice. The best way to say no to a request is to start your reply with... "Thank you for asking but I can't commit to that right now."

Or if it's really difficult to say NO but you just don't have the time, tell them WHY and BUY yourself some time.

"I would like to help but I am currently working on X,Y,Z...If you can't get anyone else to do it, the earliest I will be able to get started on it will be [day]"

This puts the ball back in their court...if they want it doing sooner than your given day, they will have to find someone else or wait until it's convenient for you.

Another method I like to use is the art of compromise. Consider what someone can do for you, if you agree to do something for them.

OK I can do that for you, but would you mind doing a testimonial for my website?

OR

I can get that report written for you by Friday, if you could help me come up with some articles for the newsletter, would that be OK?

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