The Ancient Custom Of Placing Polished Stones On Gravesites

Placing stones on gravesites is an ancient mourning custom

. Historians believe that the practice was originally a Jewish custom since early Jewish grave monuments were made of piles of stones. Mourners would add stoned to the gravesite every time they visited to pay their respects. The tradition continues to this day among people of many cultures as a way to show that loved ones have not been forgotten.

Purchasing polished stones for funerals allows everyone attending the funeral to leave a stone on the grave monument if they want. Sometimes just close family members are given polished stones and are given a moment to pay their respects by the gravesite before placing down their stone.

Remembrance stones make a beautiful gift to family or friends on anniversaries after a loved one has passed away. This not only shows that you are still there to offer your support, but allows the grieving individuals to continually pay their respects to the person that is gone from their lives. For example, the stones can be placed on a gravesite on a deceased persons birthday, a year from their death, on holidays, or any other special day.

Symbolically, stones are everlasting, just as the love for a deceased individual is everlasting. The act of placing a polished pebble on a gravesite often helps people to move through the grieving process while remembering the deceased person with a meaningful gesture.

When choosing a way to remember a loved one, it is important to choose a method that feels most fitting to you. You may honor your loved one in many different ways. Planting a memorial tree is a gesture that is ideal for a deceased family member or friend who loved the great outdoors. A memorial garden can be planted in your own backyard or in a suitable public space so that people can come and pay their respects. A memorial bench also serves this purpose and can be equipped with a plaque in honor of a special person.

Following a ritual that has been around for quite some time, as mourning stones have been, or creating a new ritual that is meaningful to you is an effective way to connect with your grief and to begin the healing process. Take the time to find a gesture that keeps your loved one alive in your heart while allowing you to heal and move on with your life in a healthy manner.

by: Renee Wood, MSW

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