There's Nothing Colder Than Ashes

There's Nothing Colder Than Ashes

There's Nothing Colder Than Ashes

There is nothing deader than a dead love. How many of us have done everything in our power to keep a love that obviously has been dead for a while. We don't want to let go of the memory of that relationship. We hang onto him like molasses. We fear being alone - being without that person in our life. Think about what it feels like - to me it feels like cold ashes. A wsie man in New York City told me those words, when I was going through a period of a dead love in my own life. It resounded in my heart, and over a year later, I get to share these words with you.

Think about cold ashes - even if you can put a match to the ashes - they're not going to flame up. They are just ashes! It doesn't feel right when you're around each other, and the way he used to treat you is no longer. His compassion for you has died and he may only be your company because he's afraid to lose you totally.

I personally choose to be alone and happy than with someone and unhappy. There comes a point where you have to make a decision. When that flame of passion dies - it's either time to start a new fire, or leave the ashes and move on in life. At times it's easier to leave since you both don't have anything invested in this relationship - you part amicably and go out and make sure you've learned from your previous mistakes.

The hardest thing to do is to start a new fire. This means that you both do things differently in the relationship. We start the flame again - you reinvent the wheel. You do things differently to reassure yourselves things won't go back to the way they were before. Again, it's not easy depending on the situation of why the embers died.

The hardest flame to relight is when there was a trust issue that got broken. An affair is a "BIG" one. Can you trust that person again? Will the memories of the other woman haunt you? Can you forgive and look past the pain that this caused? Nevertheless, you both have to be willing to start over again and re- ignite the fire.

Remember, may the possibilities today excite us all!

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