Things To Know When Preparing For A Divorce

Even if you know that a marriage is over, and it would be more harmful for all involved

to stay together than to part, divorce is challenging and complicated. Not only are you dealing with emotional issues that come with ending an intimate relationship, there are all the practical matters of severing the binds of daily living, from dealing with friends to deciding who gets to keep the pets. When children are involved, preparing for divorce is that much more stressful. Even with prenuptial divorce agreements, filing for separation is mentally and physically taxing so having a plan of action will help you get through this difficult time.

Once the decision has been made to end the marriage, take the time to decide on a divorce strategy, which in part will depend on where you live. For example, California is a no-fault, community property state, meaning you do not have to show cause for divorce, and marital property is split evenly. Filing for divorce can be done by either party, regardless of whether the spouse agrees or not.

If both you and your spouse are in agreement you can obtain what are called uncontested divorce forms. This is the easiest way to end a marriage. If your state allows it, you can use an Internet divorce service, even if there are children involved. This route is much less stressful than going to court, doesn't require hiring lawyers and costs much less money. You can download online divorce papers, fill them out, and send them in. Again, costs vary state by state.

If you opt against an Internet service, preparing for divorce is more complicated. To start, write up a checklist to help organize the steps you will need to take and the items that will need to be resolved. These steps include hiring an attorney, itemizing yours-mine-ours belongings, determining who gets the house if you own it or, if neither can buy out the other, putting the house up for sale.

Nothing causes more conflict than divorce and money. So preparing for divorce financially is particularly important. In a community property state, all the earnings made by each spouse belong to both. Even if one spouse makes $20,000 a year and the other makes $200,000, in the eyes of the law, community property means they are each entitled to $110,000. The exceptions to community property are inheritances, any earnings and goods acquired prior to marriage, gifts, things bought with one spouse's personal money or anything earned or acquired while the spouses were separated and living apart. So when preparing for divorce, leave these assets out.

Once you have itemized possessions, tabulated finances, and organized how to proceed legally, you are ready to file and start a new chapter in your life.

by: Sharon Peppers

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