Will No Contact Really Make Him Come Back?

Will No Contact Really Make Him Come Back?

Everybody tells you that if you want to get your ex back all you need to do is not contact him for a while and he will come running back to you. Well, you've tried it but you're getting nothing for all your patient waiting and not conctacting him. You worry that it might really be over or that he will just think that you finally got the message and have moved on yourself. After all, how is he supposed to know that you still care about him and still want to work things out with this rediculous no contact rule?

While the no contact rule should be a part of your plan to get him back it shouldn't be the end all be all of relationship advice if you are serious about getting back together with your ex. You are right in thinking that your ex has no idea what is going on inside your head if you don't communicate with him. Too many times a loving relationship that had great potential has died a withering death thanks to the no contact rule. Far too many times an ex goes away because he figured that his ex is either angry, done with him or has found somebody else while a woman sits waiting for him to make contact.

If you abide by the no contact rule the way that it is suggested by many you might find yourself bumping into your ex many years from now only to find out that he is married. You might find out that he was waiting for you to call him and that after the breakup you just disappeared. Guys can be rather stubborn and your ex is no exception, as I am sure you know. Even though he acts tough and during the breakup you might think that he has absolutely no heart or soul, for him to muster the courage to pick up the phone and call you after some of the things that have passed between you he would probably be expecting to get an earful.

The no contact rule is an effective way to start with a clean slate if emotions have been running high. No contact for a period of time will allow everything to settle down and for the two of you to step back and take a look at what you did to contribute to the downfall of your relationship. You might find out yourself that your ex is right about a few things and instead of blasting back at him and pointing out his own downfalls and character defects you might feel badly about how you treated him at times and make the necessary adjustments to your self. You might find that you did nag him a bit too much over trivial things that really don't matter and in retrospect you can't really see anything that was worth fighting over... your relationship was just that important to you.

No contact will give your ex some time to think about things and as they say, absence makes the heart grow fonder. And how does that work? Well, after a while all the pidly arguments and bad memories just sort of fade to black and all that is left is the warm memories of loving times spent together. This is in essence why we look back on our past and think of them as the "good old days" or when life was simpler and we were happier. Given a little time your ex will also calm down and look back on your relationship and remember the great times that you had and the nice things that you did for him. He will also feel sorrow and guilt for how he treated you and likewise change things about himself that led to your breakup. Little things that you mentioned that might not mean much now in light of your breakup will hit home once things have calmed down and he has had time to think.

So, will no contact really make him change his mind and come back to you? Can you really get him back using no contact? The answer is yes and no. Yes, giving both of you time to allow your emotions to cool off, get your lives back on track and begin to let time do its healing thing is helpful but it should not be the only thing that you do to try to get him back. Taking responsibility for what you did to cause your part of the mess that led to your breakup is important but having the courage to make the necessary changes and become the woman that you once were that loved him unconditionally is likewise important.

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