Working Moms: Say Yes To Saying No!

I've found that one of the biggest causes of stress is our inability to say no

. Whether it is out of guilt, a sense of obligation, or the desire to avoid hurt feelings, we say yes when we really shouldn't. Are you a "yes" person? If you are you overwhelmed, overscheduled and frustrated, you probably are. If so, don't feel bad - you're in good company - few of us have mastered this ability! But it's time to start because no one benefits when you take on more than you can handle - especially you.

Before you say yes to anything new, ask yourself the following questions:

* Is this something I really want to do?

* Will this benefit me?(Or my family?)

* Is this the best use of my time?

* Will my career, my family or I be negatively affected if I say no? (Don't say yes just to make someone else happy)

* Is it the right thing to do?

Just like the saying "pick your battles", you need to "pick your Yes's." You're the only one who gets to consciously choose where you're going to invest your energy and where you won't. There will be some areas where you are not willing to say 'no' yet, and that's ok - pick an area that is easier for you to say 'no' to, such as:

* Parent duty at your child's school

* Planning someone's retirement party at work

* Being on a committee or a board

* Planning the street garage sale

* Organizing your friend's 50th birthday party

If we look at it honestly, we all want to be able to do something special and contribute to the people around us. It makes us feel good and valuable, but when you say 'yes' all the time, you end up feeling drained and resentful.

I want you to know that by saying 'no', you get to save your energy, and ultimately your love, for the people and activities that are really important to you. Instead of being someone who is exhausted and stressed out, you'll be able to give much more, because you're prioritizing your "Yes" time.

by: Jenny Flintoft

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