"wheninrome,,do As Romans Do"--the Greeting Ritual

First impressions last the longest

First impressions last the longest. In this week's article, we will explore greeting rituals and how you can make your first impression a good one. There are merely four things to do in order to complete the greeting ritual successfully: smile, make eye contact, shake hands firmly and utter an appropriate greeting.

Smiling is the universal sign for goodwill, and it reduces social tension. I went to a job interview when I was about 18, and I was so nervous that I could hardly keep myself from shaking. After an eternity of five minutes, the receptionist said the manager would meet me. I moved slowly toward the manager's office door and opened it respectfully. There, standing behind his desk with his hand outstretched in greeting, was a portly man of about 50, and he was grinning from ear to ear. "Come in and have a seat, David," he said. He shook my hand and told me that he was happy I had come. It wasn't long before my anxiety melted away in the glow of his bright smile and warm gestures. When I left that meeting with my new job, I couldn't remember why I had been so afraid in the first place. A warm smile made all the difference.

In some cultures, eye contact is a sign of aggression especially when it is made between inferiors and superiors, but in most western countries it is a sign of honesty and goodwill. Eye contact simply means to look at someone directly into their eye.. Although staring long into someone else's eyes can be considered inappropriate if that person is not a loved one, making proper eye contact during the greeting ritual is absolutely necessary. In western countries, a person who cannot or will not make eye contact is perceived to be dishonest. Remember, during the greeting ritual, you must make eye contact.

The handshake is, perhaps, the most memorable part of the greeting ritual because we actually make physical contact for the first time. When shaking hands, one must remember that the handshake must be firm. That is, you must squeeze the other person's hand tightly - not enough to cause discomfort, but it must firm enough to register as tight. A soft, wilted handshake is considered offensive, and such a handshake is the easiest way to make a terrible first impression. As you shake hands, you should lean into it slightly. That is lean toward the person with whom you are shaking hands in sort of a tiny bow. A good, firm handshake is a strong foundation upon which a lifelong friendship can be built. Remember, keep it firm!

As one smiles at a new acquaintance, looking into his or her eyes , shaking hands firmly, it is then expected that one will say some words of greeting. This phase is the easiest part of the greeting ritual because our greetings are formulaic. "How do you do, Mr. X" is a very formal greeting, and it is appropriate if one is meeting a superior. "Nice to meet you" is very common and acceptable in most situations. It is important to remember that questions like "how do you do" or "how are you" are part of the greeting ritual and are not intended to investigate your situation. The correct answer to both questions is "finethank you, and you?"

by: tiffany25

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