subject: Stopping Divorce – How To Save Your Marriage [print this page] When your spouse start to consider divorce as a solution, then you need to act fast. Stopping divorce means first making a commitment to save your relationship. Both of you have decided to be together for a reason; what happened to that? And you know that there are happy couples who have weathered the storms for 30, 40, 50 years and even longer. Let's get started right now.
How Do You Communicate?
Lack of communication is the world's biggest relationship killer. Without good communication, your marriage is finished and it's as simple as that. Yet, what makes good versus bad communication?
- Whenever things go wrong, it is bad to put the blame on your spouse. It's also bad to wallow in guilt if you are the culprit. Instead, when your partner does something wrong, forgive and offer them another chance. When you're the one that messed up, take responsibility for your actions and make a commitment to not doing it again.
- While talking things over, it's bad to be rash and attempt to fix things. When we are talking to each other about critical things, what we need is a good listener. This means somebody that offers empathy and a good ear. What we don't need is advice, opinions and solutions.
- Never say "yes" when you mean "no." A relationship is a bond among two different people, and both of them need to be happy. Be truthful about what you expect and need, and never give in when you don't feel it's right.
- Never use silence as a weapon. The cold shoulder won't take you anywhere. Should you find it hard to share how you feel, try writing them down in a letter. Do anything necessary to let them know how you feel.
How Do You Deal With Cheating?
Cheating is another typical ground for divorce. A lot of people say that if their partner cheats, that's it; it's finished. You can never have trust in your spouse ever again. This is easy to say, but when it truly happens, it's more complicated than that. It's never so black and white.
When dealing with the real thing, the majority of us make an effort to work it out. A lot of marriages have suffered infidelity and bounced back to be stronger than ever. A cheater will likely keep lying to reduce the damage, but what they should do is put all the cards on the table.
The reason for this is that cheating is merely a warning sign of a much deeper problem. You have to get to that problem and deal with it, or else it will happen again. Then, trust has to be rebuilt. It takes lots of time for this to happen, but it can be done if you're committed to it.
All of Us Change
Marriages lose their spark, their sense of adventure. Suddenly you become simply just friends or, even worse, partners in operating a household. The sex and intimacy fade away, and some people who wish a divorce even tell their partners, "I don't love you anymore." Normally, this is brought on by changes in your lives, and your marriage hasn't "improved" to meet these changes.
The majority of people don't realize how easy it is to get this intimacy back. Not only can you get it back, you will get more of it than you ever had before. Plan some time to spend along with each other with no distractions. Go out on dates just like you did when you first met. Imagine that you've got to win your partner over again. This is a certain strategy that's help a lot of marriages get their spark back, and keep divorce away from their lives.
Being in a marriage life for years sometimes make us forget that keeping a happy marriage require some efforts. Stopping divorce means you'll have to cut your time and effort on other things and start pouring some of it into your marriage. Deal with your issues, and you'll have a stronger, healthier and more exciting marriage than you ever expected.
