subject: People Respond To A Winner [print this page] I feel that the law of preservation causes us to gravitate to people who seem to have everything under control. We feel safe when we are under their leadership so we want to be around them. Normally the more aggressive types are the type which people will follow. This type of person do seem to manage to get their way out of life and out of people. They grow comfortable with being in charge and begin to display more of the tendencies which got them there in the first place. This forms a type of self fulfilling prophect in which more people begin to gravitate to them. As they realize the attention that they are getting they develop more of the attention getting traits. You can see the spiral here.
People are generally not fooled by false confidence. They know and want the real deal. False confidence shows up as arrogance, or just behavior which is out of place.
Real self confidence is quiet. It doesnt need to brag or boast because it knows the outcome. A person with real confidence doesn't have to put on a show. This person knows by their past experience what they can do. There was once a Cuban boxer named Teofilio Stevenson. He was a amateur boxer but was undefeated. He was very well respected by other fighters as he should have been. Whenever he had a fight he would not try to stare the other fighter down. He would confidently evaluate the other fighter's physical condition. He was looking for strengths and flaws. He knew that he was not invincible but he knew that if he fought the right fight that he would win. He didn't feel the need to exhibit brash behavior. This is the example of real confidence.
Confidence on the inside shows up on the outside. You can develop confidence by practicing confidence until it becomes natural to project it. Control your fears and emotions and go for what you know. Learn how to be confident even when you may not feel that way. What do you mean you ask? You can follow a procedure and trust in the procedure to do what it is supposed to if you perform it correctly. Even if you are not sure of yourself you can find something that you can be sure of. Let that thing serve you and carry you to the next level. Confidence will come with practice.
When I look at myself I know most of my strengths and weaknesses. I try to operate in those areas where I am strong and work on the weak areas. If there is a critical task to be performed I will try to find someone who can perform it if it is one of my weak areas.
I wont try to impress you in those areas because I know that I cant. I know that Im good at many things, and very good at a few things. I dont hesitate to tackle those things that Im good at. If I need advice I will also not hesitate to ask. Confidence is not a show, it is knowing what reality is and being able to overcome the situation. My life experiences have let me know that I can do anything that the average person can do. When I was younger I would participate in several sports. I was strong and could muscle most people around. As I got older I began to lose
physical strength. I had to learn how to use psychological factors to help me to win. In any event i was able to get the job done. That's what winning is about. When you look at a winning football team's record you will see that they had some games that they barely won but they found a way to win. Winning isn't always pretty, its coming out on top when the smoke has cleared.
Once when I was in the military we were on a field exercise and were required to perform a task that we had never been trained to do. One of my soldiers came to the front with a field manual in his hands and told me that his old outfit had trained on the task many times so I put him in charge. He stood there with his manual opened to the procedure and gave directions to the rest of the unit. They simply did as they were told and we not only passed the evaluation but got an excellent rating. He informed me months later that he had never performed the operation before in his life. He had simply found the directions in the manual and read them to us. Thats what real confidence will do for you.
Truly confident people are not insecure at all. They are CONFIDENT. Riceland Enterprises
