subject: After a Break Up: How to Tell If Your Ex Wants to Get Back Together [print this page] Author: Author: . Cee" href="http://www.articlesbase.com/authors/j.r.-cee/334538.htm">J.R. Cee
So, you've recently gone through a painful breakup and your ex is starting to show signs of interest. He or she is calling and texting to go places and spend time with you. You may even wonder if they're actually flirting with you. It's natural to wonder if they want to get back together. So how do you really know if your ex wants to get back together? You certainly don't want to get your hopes up or play the fool. Breakups are hard enough. Head games and irrational hopes are too much to put up with.
Even if all these signals mean your ex is still interested, it's important to stay rational and protect yourself from further harm. Resist the temptation to go back to the old terms. If you're going to salvage anything or create something new and better, it's important to take it slow and remain reserved. After a break up, the interest level could increase simply because you're unavailable and visibly absent. If you act too eager, your ex could pull away and start the whole push, pull struggle all over again. Many exes don't realize they simply want what they can't have. So, go ahead and play hard to get (be reasonable). This will give you time to adjust and monitor what's really going on. It also gives you the chance to observe your feelings and needs in the equation.
After a long term relationship ends, it's natural to miss one other. You can't easily erase a history of intimacy and shared experiences. It would be nice if there was a magic button. Remember, you spent every day moments, birthdays, holidays and significant life changes with each other. It will be important to find out if missing each other is substantial and real or just the inevitable emotional adjustments that take place after any breakup. The only way to know is to take it slow, keep a bit of distance and preserve your autonomy. Make sure you're looking out for your interests, taking time for yourself and following your gut reactions. Like it or not, you're still vulnerable to hurt and disappointment. So, proceed cautiously. Unfortunately, there are some ex's that just want to use you to help them transition. They can't accept the loneliness, starting over or taking care of their own lives. Knowing you have feelings for them, they turn to you for support to kill time, have someone to talk or to just help them mask their true feelings. Even worse, some of these types don't even realize they're doing it. They'll latch onto you, act interested and some will even resume having sex with you until they feel better or find someone new. So, remember to look out for yourself. Protect your heart and mind from further disappointment. After a break up, your ex might want to get back together for all the wrong reasons. Inevitably, if this is the case, you'll have to start over at square one when they devastate you again. Game players and users are everywhere. When a person is emotionally distraught, they may turn to tactics that aren't normally part of their character.
So, lay back and keep some space and perspective. If you take things slowly and play it cool, you'll have a better chance at a positive reconciliation. Also, if you proceed cautiously, you'll be able to find out if your ex wants to get back for the right reasons. Don't make it too easy for your ex. Many will reveal their true motives when they find out you're not a pushover. This alone might save you from getting hurt.About the Author:
If you'd like more information about what to expect after a break up, visit: After A Break Up If you'd like to learn new methods for getting back together with your ex, visit: Get Ex Back