subject: Good Communication Skills Will Make You Happy [print this page] Having good communication skills will make you happy and everyone else around you happy too. And this is so easy to do because you can have full control over the process. You can't do a lot of things that will change anything but you can and do, have the power to change how you think and how you relate to others around you. You can also alter your own environment simply because you have the power to do so. All you need is the will to change how you think.
Every person on earth speaks to themselves in their head. Next time you are on a train, plane or bus, take note of everyone around you and realise how many different conversations are going on that no one else ever hears. When you start to think of the world around you like this, one of the biggest changes that happens is in your own head.
You finally realise that you aren't alone. How can anyone feel alone unless they think they are; especially when you know that everyone around you is talking to themselves in your world? To see whether they are having a positive or negative conversation with themselves can occasionally be seen by how they are holding their mouths or how hard they are holding onto something in their lap. This is a pretty good guide as to what they could be talking to themselves about. The eyes are another give away. If you watch their eyes you can sometimes glimpse the positive or negativeness of their thoughts.
Don't get this wrong; I am certainly not advocating that you stare at someone. That is just plain rude, bad mannered and totally unacceptable.
One of the other things to be aware of is that each one of these very, super private conversations going on in everyone's head, is not necessarily complimentary to the person hearing it. Notice your own conversation going on in your own head when you are noticing everyone else's private conversations? Are your thoughts kind or are they derogatory thoughts about how others look, or how others are holding their mouths, or how they are dressed?
When travelling on public transport today, everyone is so careful not to intrude on anyone else's space. If you accidentally catch someone's eye while looking at people around you, do you immediately take evasive action or do you try to relate to their presence by a nod, smile, happy grin or say Hello?
I have noticed from my travels around the world that people in countries with a big population compared to countries with a smaller population behave very differently. In Australia, where there is a relatively smaller population, people usually nod, say G'Day, Hello or Hi. Even if it's just a nod, we acknowledge each others presence.
On the outback roads around Australia, when travelling in the most remote parts of the country, people in vehicles all wave to each other. The most common wave is a lifting of the forefinger showing an open hand with the forefinger raised. It is such a nice way to 'see' each other. When you get the big road trains passing you with an outback wave, you are usually grateful that they have acknowledged your presence on the road, simply because they have a lot more wheels than you do!
People here tend to greet each other with a smile and an openness not found in countries with larger populations. In countries with larger populations, one of their 'survival' mechanisms seems to be to ignore everyone else.
To someone from a smaller population, who is used to looking people in the eye and speaking to everyone, found living this way quite eerie. How can a room full of people all totally ignore each other? No wonder people feel alone. They "make" themselves alone and unhappy in their minds when all they need to do is to look at someone, nod, smile, grin or say Hello. To live this way is simply applying thoughtful communication skills to make ourselves and everyone else around us happy.
