subject: All That Vibration Exercise For The Queen Of The Parade [print this page] It was painfully good genes that had me flown halfway across the globe for a fleeting holiday in moms native land, the Philippines. Though born and raised in Canada, Ive always been accustomed to the Filipino culture. You can only imagine my excitement when I found out I was finally flying to moms hometown in time for the tropical summer.
I prepped myself for endless days of lounging in the whitest sand and dipping in the bluest waters of the tropical paradise. Being naturally slender, I had little to no problem fitting into even the slinkiest bikinis. Just to be sure that I had all muscles toned; I made dads vibration exercise machine my new BFF. Getting that whole body vibration exercise was remarkably effective as my skin-tight spandex bikini felt two-sizes-too-big just after a week of vibration training. Mom reassured me thered be no wardrobe mishaps as Id regain the rather unexpected weight what with the traditional high-calorie Filipino fare.
Mom advised me to put off my trip to the beach when we finally arrived in the smoldering hot island of Cebu as there was a huge gathering at grandmoms place. True enough when we got to the ancestral home, there were a bazillion people on the street. What I found particularly bothersome was everyone was dressed to the nines as though unaware that it was bazillion degrees out. Mom explained the town was celebrating the traditional santacruzan and grandmom was the so-called Hermana Mayor that everyone had to gather in her home.
All eyes were on me the moment I got down from the SUV. Perhaps because of my complexion that is literally pale in comparison to everyone elses or because of my rather skimpy outfit that seemed suddenly inappropriate. Grandmom rushed to my side along with her trusted helper who carried a big fluffy white gown that could pass as a cloud. Judging by grandmoms smile, I had a feeling I was to get into the gown; that being the least of my fears.
Blame it on the heat that I was practically delusional and couldnt quite put into words what really happened. I got into the gown, got in line with the rest of the strikingly beautiful ladies and gents and got on with the procession. No one bothered telling me I was the festivitys highlight, being the Reyna Elena, or so they kept referring to me. Had I been told I was to walk for miles in heels, I wouldve had a foot detox to get my feet all prepped up.
Caught up in foot bath thoughts, my foot got caught up in the hem of my gown. My partner, Constantino, tried to break my fall but ended up on the ground with me as well. My falling to the ground wasnt exactly the issue, but rather, my gown falling down even before me. Had I went to the beach instead, the Queen wouldnt have shamed herself with a nasty not-just-nip-slip but whole body-slip.
