subject: How To Meet Her Friends [print this page] The beginning of a relationship can be difficult as there are many differences between two people which can cause problems. One of the first real milestones in matchmaking is the invitation to meet your girlfriend's friends.
The time to meet friends signifies a great deal in a new relationship and also carries a great deal of weight. The impression left on a woman's friends can be very helpful or harmful and may even significantly change the chemistry built up while dating.
When the time comes to take this significant step you should be well prepared to make the best impression possible; not by acting in a deceptive way, but certainly on your best behavior. Though many men respect the opinion of a friend might have about their new sweetheart, this often goes double for women and to bungle the first meeting may have a lasting negative effect.
Test the Waters:
Before you plan to meet your sweetheart's closest gal pals it is wise to know what kind of charms will work and what might be considered over the top or phony. To get an idea of how much might be too much try testing some of your smoothest mannerisms on your girlfriend; this might help to give you some idea of how her friends might perceive your debonair act.
Per-meeting Meet:
Statistically women are more likely to chat over the phone with their friends than men and if you're around your girlfriend enough you will more than likely be present during bits and pieces of conversations. If the opportunity should arise for you to answer the phone, take a moment to ask her friend how she is doing. Though you may not get into a deep conversation, many women take note of such pleasantries and you may find that this will help in winning yourself a favorable first impression.
A Little Research:
One stereotype that is often true about women is that they love to chitchat. If your lady is one of this type it should be fairly easy to get her to open up about what some of her friends are like. Having some idea of the type of women you'll be meeting may be of great use.
*Flattery and Compliments: Knowing a bit about your girlfriend's friends can help you to understand what type of reactions you will get to certain forms of behavior. Paying a woman a compliment, for example, has been for many years considered an appropriate thing to do upon introduction. Taking that compliment too far or saying something inappropriate however can really hurt your chances for making a good impression. By inquiring about such things prior to your first meeting you can avoid over stepping your boundaries.
While on the subject of flattery, complimenting your girlfriend while in her friend's presence can be a great way to gain respect. Unlike the stereotypical male dynamic, where men often find that if their friend's girlfriend teases in their company, women often prefer the offering of loyalty. Once again, over doing this type of flattery will likely come off as fraudulent and that has a poor chance of winning over her friends, so when complimenting remember not to lay it on too thick.
*Conversation Topics: The ability to speak with your girlfriend's friends about subjects that they are interested in is an excellent way to earn their approval. Though you may not have a great deal in common, it may prove useful to begin by focusing on subjects that you can share easily. To get an idea ahead of time, simply ask your girlfriend about her friend's interests; not only will this give some ammunition to work with, but your lady will likely find your enthusiasm endearing.
*Vulgarity: Thousands of years of evolution and equality amongst the sexes have changed a great deal, but certain divides still remain between men and women. One such divide is that men who have a tendency to be vulgar around women are often heavily judged for it. Though in time you may be able to relax and not worry much about such niceties, for your first meeting allow the women to set the bar on what is considered appropriate and what might be too vulgar. By following their lead you will not blunder into a reputation that is undeserved by speaking a few poorly chosen words.
Presentation:
Having a reasonably good sense of style and excellent hygiene can go along way with women and this is just as true of your girlfriend's circle. Keep in mind that her friends will be very likely judging whether or not they believe you are good enough to be with her and though this may sound a bit harsh, you wouldn't want to give them any reason for complaint.
When you go to meet her friends it is important that you address the three main components which can make the meeting a successful one:
*Appearance: Dressing for the occasion is the safest approach to make a good impression. If heading somewhere casual then match your clothes accordingly. When the meeting is set in a more formal setting, a little extra attention to your appearance is considered appropriate. This is an excellent time to allow your girlfriend to advise you on any little changes to your wardrobe or style.
Keep in mind that if your normal way of dressing is often considered stylish you probably won't have any trouble in this department, but if you have been known to live in the classic jeans and t-shirt combo, you may want to put in the extra effort for the occasion if appropriate. The most important issue to address on the subject of appearance is hygiene; most women will notice if you are lacking in this area and it can really hurt your chances for making a good impression.
*Mannerisms: How you act and what you say when meeting your girlfriend's friends is what will most likely allow you to be accepted. The information you have gathered about what types of people you will be meeting should arm you against any particularly embarrassing blunders, but if you should still feel nervous just remember to be respectful and try to keep calm.
A little humor and some interesting conversation will often allow you to breeze through meeting new friends even when the situation is a bit tense. Keep in mind that if your attitude is one that might appear as if you are looking to make new friends amongst your girlfriend's trusted circle; you are very likely to walk away with the respect and approval of the group.
Another useful when in the company of your sweetheart's friends is to treat them all with the same level of respect that you treat you own lady. An example might an action such as pulling out a chair, or holding a door; if you often do these types of things for your girlfriend extending that courtesy to those she keeps close will win her heart and the level of respect you're hoping to achieve.
*Enthusiasm: The level of interest that you show during your first time meeting with her friends can also be a symbol of how much you love dating your girlfriend. If you make a real effort to make a good impression, this symbolizes that you care very much about your partner and that you have perhaps even given thought to your future together.
The impression you leave behind after such a vital landmark in your dating life is an important statement and shouldn't be taken lightly. For those not looking to intensify their casual relationship, it will be important not to overdo charming her friends. Those looking for a little dating help and to increase the closeness that they share with their girlfriend will want to take the first meeting quite seriously. Whichever type you are, remember that your actions during this event speak loudly and will most likely be analyzed later by the group.
Making too much of a situation that in all truth only calls for a person's best behavior can cause you to feel overly anxious about meeting the friends of your girlfriend. By remembering some of the basics and making an effort you are likely to make a success of the meeting and in doing so show your lady how much you care for the life you have begun to share.
