subject: The Power Of Body Language [print this page] Even when you don't say a word, other people can still learn a lot about what kind of person you are & what you are thinking & feeling. How do other people do this? By studying your body language.
You have been reacting to the body language, voice tone, & facial expressions of the people around you all of your life, although you may not have been consciously aware of it. What sorts of messages are you conveying to others along with your body language? Does your body language encourage other people to approach you? Or do you subconsciously warn them to stay away?
Take a moment to think about the way you usually stand or sit when you are with other people. What are you doing along with your hands? Where are you looking along with your eyes? Does your face express interest in the people you are with, or does your face stay a tense, stony mask?
When you are sitting or standing, do you usually cross your arms across your chest? If this is your typical way of standing or sitting, how do you think other people interpret this posture? Did you recognize that most people will subconsciously interpret your arms crossed in front of your chest as a signal that you don't need somebody to approach you? Only the bravest souls are likely to come forward when you adopt this posture.
In case you stand awkwardly, along with your chest slumped forward, your shoulders drooping, & your eyes avoiding everyone else, people are likely to choose you are very depressed or lacking in confidence. They may fear that trying to speak with you will be an awkward experience.
When you stand awkwardly, you do not project any sign that you are confident in yourself, or that you have any interest in the people around you. In lieu you look like you are trying to disappear.
No matter how desperately you need someone to come over & befriend you, if your body language projects awkwardness or disinterest in others, it's not very likely that plenty of people will try to start a conversation with you.
What are you doing along with your hands? In case you get nervous in social situations, you may feel that no matter what you do along with your hands, it's the wrong thing. Plenty of individuals who cross their arms in front of their chest are probably doing so at least in part because they don't know where else to put their hands.
What kind of facial expression ought to you have in case you need people to approach you? In most cases, a light, pleasant smirk ought to do the trick. Much of a smirk that seldom softens can look forced & nervous. A pleasant smirk with a twinkle in your eyes will convey to other people the impression that chatting with you will be a pleasant experience.
Stay aware of & focused on your surroundings & the people around you. In case you find yourself tuning out your surroundings, you will start to focus much on your negative inner sensations & thoughts. This can quickly increase your anxiety to a very uncomfortable level.
