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subject: How To Control Negative Thinking And Rapidly Become Happy [print this page]

How can you be happier more of the time, no matter what your circumstances?

How does one person manage to be up and going for it day after day, and

others just can't quite get it together? They're always negative.

They're always down. They're always grumpy. They're always feeling

tired. Why?

Well, it really is a choice more than anything else. Unless there's

something physiologically wrong with you, or you're brain damaged, or

you are chemically imbalanced, then it's what you're thinking.

You focus on what you can do something about, on the solutions, instead

of focusing on what you can't do anything about, or the problems.

Happiness really comes from positive self-talk. It's from a positive

thinking pattern. It's from giving yourself a primary focus on things

you can do something about. It's a choice and you make that choice

moment to moment, day to day.

About six months ago, there was a gentleman who was referred to me by

his doctor. He was referred to me for severe depression. He was an

executive for a major company and he had been laid off. He had not been

able to find work for almost a year. Anti-depressants didn't seem to

be working, nothing he tried seem to help.

When he came to see me and I was diagnosing what was going on, one of

the things that immediately stood out, was that he was continuously

focused on the bad. He focused on the fact that he couldn't find

interviews. And when he did find the interviews, he felt so desperate

to get the job that the interviews were lousy.

He totally forgot to think about all the positive aspects of his life.

He had a great relationship with his wife. He had wonderful children

who were happy and healthy and they loved school. They liked doing

things with the family. His health was superb overall, except he was

depressed. He was physically strong and healthy. He was brilliant, he

was always learning new things. The guy had a lot going for him. But

he forgot about all of that.

He spent all of his time focused on what wasn't working. "I can't find

a job. We need money." Desperation. It caused him huge stress and

lots of problems.

The first thing I had him do was to begin to focus on what he could do

something about, his thinking patterns. And when he began to change

his choice of focus, all of a sudden, life began to be a little better.

His depression began to lift. His wife said he began to be more like

his old self. He began to be more energetic, and he and his children

had more fun playing together.

He had an interview set up for a new job. When he was going there,

instead of going in depressed and desperate, he had worked on his

attitude. He went in thinking, "I might get it, I might not. But, I

believe I can make a positive impression on these people. This would

be good for me and good for them." He went in with a proactive,

powerful mindset. Guess what? They hired him on the spot at more

money than he was making prior to getting laid off!

After they hired him, his boss said the primary reason they hired him

was that they wanted somebody on their team who was as positive and

proactive as he was. They said his demeanor, the way he carried

himself, and his positive attitude was exactly what they needed to take

their company up the next step.

He was that man. But he had stopped focusing on the positive and

started focusing on what he didn't have instead of what he did have.

We each have that choice. Every moment, every day, you make that

choice, either focus on the good stuff you have in life and what you

have, or to focus on the bad stuff and what you don't have. Focus on

what you don't have, you'll have less. Focus on what you do have; the

world will give you more. The universe supplies all kinds of things to

you. It's your choice of focus.

Make everyday a positive focus. Be proactive. Take steps and each one

can help move you closer to your ultimate goal, to the things you want

to attain in your life. You can have whatever you want,better

relationships, improved health, more money, better lifestyle, you can

have it all. You can transform your life moment to moment, day to day.

The Best of Success to You.

by: Dr. Larry Iverson

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