subject: Contacting Your Ex After a Breakup - Should You Do It? [print this page] Author: Jon Kozlov Author: Jon Kozlov
When it comes to how to get your ex back you may be feeling a bit overwhelmed. Life and relationships are hard enough as it is, but when you're broken up from the person you care about, life can be at its worst. There are ways to get your ex back though that are going to help you out of this slump.
First of all, you must understand that you're not alone. There are millions of people that go through the same traumatic relationship falters as you're going through right now. You can't let yourself be the victim, feeling sorry for your self is only going to hurt you over the long run. The first thing you need to do is make peace with what happened, understand that you are broken up and it takes work to fix it. Living in fantasy land isn't going to save you any misery over the long run. When you get discouraged remember that 90% of breakups can be reversed, it's true...so don't panic.
All right, now it's time to give your ex some space. I know, this is a lot easier than it sounds right now. But it's something you absolutely have to do. Your ex has to have a chance to miss you before they can want you back.
If you're in constant communication with them they feel like they have power over you, they have no need to miss you because they know they can get you back any second. So take that power away, hide your cell phone, close out that email and DO NOT contact them at any cost!
While you're giving your ex some space, relax and use this time for your self. Not everything should be about your ex you know! Figure out why you broke up in the first place. Can you live with it? Can you avoid the same issues in the future? As long as you're feeling positive about it then you're in the right position to keep going.
After a good long break, at least 30 days, it's time for step two, giving your ex a call to try and meet them over coffee or drinks. Setting up a meeting with your ex is a great way to sort out whatever it was that tore you two apart. But, if you want it to be successful there is one thing you absolutely have to do...
Be prepared. You can't come in and fall apart. All the work you've done giving your ex space is going to be worthless if you start begging them to be with you again, or forgive you. This meeting isn't to "get back together" it's just another step in the process.
About the Author:
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