subject: The Main Cause Of Trouble In Marriage [print this page] Anybody who gets married will experience trouble in marriage at some point. You can be best friends and still disagree on different things. The first signs of trouble in marriage often surprises people and can cause more problems. There are mainly two reasons for trouble in marriage.
Misunderstanding Is The Usual Cause
It is essential to be aware of the basic differences of men and women if a couple wants to make their marriage work. Knowing what each others love needs are and then giving it to them is what will make the difference between a loving relationship or divorce.
Men and women were created with different needs and different ways of expressing those needs. Many times the woman says the man only wants sex and the man says all the woman wants to do is talk. This is very frustrating to both people because they feel as if they are not having their needs met.
The Needs of Women
Talking is the way women express and feel love. They have a need to be listened to. Women must have their feelings validated by their man for them to feel safe and loved. When a man just listens to her she feels cared for inside. This is where many men have made huge mistakes.
She does not want his help. She wants him to listen. When he listens she feels like she is being loved and will feel like showing love back. If she knows how her man feels love and shows him then the marriage will blossom into something beautiful.
Men have the natural instinct to hear a problem and try to fix it. They offer solutions to the woman to help her but it is often rejected. She does not want a solution as much as she wants to be heard and validated. Most men do not recognize this and will become angry because she will not accept his help.
The Needs of Man
The biggest troubles in marriage usually begins here. Man feels loved through sex. His self confidence and ego are strengthened when his wife wants him. If he is always struggling to get sex he will feel like he is struggling to get love.
In many cases the woman feels that all her husband ever wants is sex. If she understood the needs of her husband then she would realize that he wants love. He wants her to want him. This is how he will feel accepted and validated by his wife.
To rid yourselves of trouble in marriage you must understand the love language of your spouse. Understanding these simple differences of how men and women express and feel love will prevent much of the trouble in marriage. The man should listen to his wife without trying to fix all of her problems for her. If she needs help she will ask. She just wants her feeling validated.
The wife should understand that her husband is looking for love and acceptance too. Sex is the love language of man. When the husband and wife are aware of these two simple truths their lives together will grow and there will be less trouble in marriage. Learn the love language of your wife or husband and you will be able to build a healthy marriage.
