subject: If Your Relationship Is No Longer Exciting, Would A Couple's Tune-up Help? [print this page] Sometimes even the best of relationships get thrown off track and need some extra help. Couples counseling, in the form of a tune-up could be just the assistance needed to get going in the right direction again. If you were to ask one hundred people to define a "good" relationship you would very likely hear one hundred different answers. Most of us would think that the definition really depends on who you ask. The reality is that most answers are very similar. Most people believe that in all good relationships people want to feel valued, heard, understood, trusted and respected. Good, open communication is another component that most couples seek. While this is what most people want, how this looks and translates into actions can vary significantly from one couple to the next.
No matter how good a relationship is, there will be problems to resolve as long as the couple is together. The seriousness of these problems and the ease with which they are ameliorated varies. Although some problems cross the line and become irreparable, most can be resolved, especially if caught early and discussed openly. Some people however, need help with communication and in being able to express their needs.
During a couple's tune-up, the first job for the counselor will be to help the two people agree on just what the problems are. While the couple may believe that the issue is constant bickering, the real underlying problem could be finances, difference is child rearing ideas, lack of effective communication, loss of intimacy, failure to take time for the romance, and more. Once the problem (s) is defined, work can begin on re-igniting the spark that brought the couple together in the first place.
Some people resist therapy because of the fear of being judged. Others are reticent about laying their problems out in the open, which makes them feel more vulnerable. Still others are resistant because they are afraid of the unknown.
Couple's counseling can often be short-term, especially when the issues are identified and confronted quickly and appropriately. During a "tune-up", a counselor can help the couple gain insight into their own behaviors and how those behaviors are impacting the relationship.
Having a professional unbiased third-party has proven immeasurably successful for millions of couples all over the world. Relationships have been rejuvenated and renewed. Many times couples report that going to couple's counseling is the best thing they have ever done and that their relationship is much better than before.
