subject: Zen Success: You're afraid of the dark... (so am I) [print this page] Zen Success: You're afraid of the dark..Zen Success: You're afraid of the dark... (so am I)
I noticed something yesterday morning; my 3-year-old daughter is afraid of the dark, but my 11-year-old son isn't. Not shocking, I suppose.... but a month ago, the situation was the exact opposite. That situation, along with a couple of other experiences I've had, convinced me of the following: We're all afraid of the dark. Until recently, my younger child had no fear of the dark. She insisted on sleeping with the lights off and the door closed. Dark and quiet, so perfect for sleeping. My son, however, for many years has wanted the door open, and the lights on in the hallway.
Within the last month, they've completely swapped attitudes. He's realized that there's nothing in the dark that isn't there in the light. My daughter is even afraid to walk down the hallway now if it's not well-lit. Have you noticed when we're born, we're afraid of essentially nothing. We'd happily run down the middle of the street naked, not a concern in the world. We'll say anything to anyone, under any circumstances, not a shred of anxiety to be found. The dark is not a problem at this point either, but along the way we learn to be afraid of the dark along with everything thing else we grow to fear.
Near the end, our understanding evolves until we're not afraid of much anymore. Sit down and really talk to an older person near the end of his life, or someone of any age in hospice care. At that point, we are granted a new understanding of life and the world. People in that situation aren't afraid anymore of what anyone thinks. They say and do as they please, just like very young children. It's something to consider; if you're not going to be afraid when you're 80 years old, why not just start being fearless now?
After all, it's really just being afraid of the dark. Not easy, for sure, but that doesn't mean it's not worth pursuing. Imagine you only had 1 year left to live; what would your general attitude be regarding all the things you're afraid to do and say? Would you still be afraid to ask out that beautiful woman/man? Would you still worry about the opinion of others? Would you still be afraid to sing outside of the shower? Would you be willing to stand tall and take up a significant amount of space in the world?
From the moment we're born, we're all dying; some of us are just a little closer than others.
