subject: Attracting Women - The Quickest Way To Get Results [print this page] Do you meet a lot of women, but you do not get what you want with them? Maybe you have learnt how to engage and attract women you meet in bars or clubs, or during the day... Perhaps, you can even get their phone numbers pretty regularly... BUT... You get only a few dates, and rarely get sexual with women... If that's the case, you may feel a bit stuck, and ask yourself questions like: "What am I doing wrong? Why am I not getting results?"
Chasing The Wrong Goals
Well, there are plenty of things guys DO wrong when they relate to women. But perhaps the biggest mistake you can make is to CHASE THE WRONG GOALS. And by "chasing the wrong goals" I mean pursuing something that you think you should want, or that other people want for you, and NOT what you REALLY want deep inside. For example, one of the most frequent goals I hear from guys is to become a "pick-up artist" who seduces women everywhere he goes (which is mostly noisy bars and clubs) and has his own "sex buddies" in many cities around the world. While there's nothing inherently wrong with this goal, ask yourself: is it what YOU really want? Or is it something that was imposed on you by your friends or by the notorious "seduction community", while what YOU want is totally different?
You see, I spent a few precious years of my life chasing teenage "Britney's" in bars (young, drunk, and mainly dumb party girls) and wondered: why am I not getting "results"?.. Well, that was before I learnt that what I really wanted was a deep, meaningful connection with women who can match me on many various levels: socially, mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually. I also learnt that I didn't want "one night stands", but wanted to enjoy and explore the sexual connection with a woman again and again. And when I got clear on what I wanted, I finally started to date those women who fulfilled my deepest dreams and desires.
What Do You REALLY Want?
So my question to you is: "What do you REALLY want"? Not what you should want, or what your friends or family want for you, but what do you GENUINELY want for yourself? Take your time to answer this question, as once you are clear on your REAL desires are, you can set your REAL goals, and then it's a completely different ball game!
For example, one of my clients was spending 5 nights a week in bars and clubs speaking to party girls that he couldn't really relate to, while what he really wanted was to find a great long-term girlfriend for himself. Once he got clear on this, he completely reshuffled his schedule to spend more time out during the day, where he could have "quality" interactions with various kinds of women, not just bar girls. He also carried on going out for a couple of nights per week, but mainly to hang out and have fun with his friends, not just to attract women. As a result, he met a lot of women who matched his standards for a great girlfriend during his day interactions, and he also had much more fun chatting to his friends and to women who happened to be around him during the night.
Here is a great exercise for you that will help you to overcome your frustration of not "getting results" and to finally start getting what you want:
The "REAL Goals" Exercise
1. Ask yourself: "What do I REALLY want?" Imagine what you life would look and feel like when you finally got it, and then write down in detail what it would be like for you.
2. Set yourself a few genuine goals, based on what you discovered in part 1. Remember to have your goals stated in positive, make them specific and measurable, and also set deadlines.
3. Decide what changes you will make to your lifestyle to help you achieve your goals in the best way. For example, you may need to shift your working hours, or consider changing your job altogether. You may also want to change the places you go, or the times you go there.
4. Finally, once you clear on what needs to be done, start acting! Follow the slogan: "desire" + "action" = "success", and you will "get there" very soon!
