subject: How To Gain Confidence - False Confidence Isn't Good Enough [print this page] Can you spot false confidence if you saw it? Do you know what false confidence is?
Every day we see people who we think are confident. We think they are masters of their domain. We think that they are totally in control. But we are wrong! They are not actually confident at all. Quite the opposite. They are completely insecure and racked with doubt. They have false confidence.
But how can we be so wrong about them? How come we couldnt spot their false confidence? For a start they could just be a very good actor. It is possible to act confident and yet not be. This is not true confidence.
But more common than that, is assuming that confidence in one area translates into confidence in others. When you see a professional sportsperson, and you see them in action, it is easy to assume that they are confident people. Their confidence in their sport, makes you think that they are generally confident. But the fact is the confidence a sportsperson has, is very specialized. They have practiced for hours and hours over many years. Their competence makes them confident in that particular area. But take them out of their sport and put them in another unfamiliar situation and some of them wouldnt know what to do.
It is easy to mistake someones competence in a certain area for confidence. But that is not true confidence. True confidence is the ability to maintain self-assurance when you are in familiar and unfamiliar situations. If you cant do that , youre not confident.
The thing is, developing true confidence involves a totally different approach to false confidence. False confidence is acquired by becoming very very good at something. You competence makes you feel confident. But true confidence is about building your inner self-worth.
This is also a learnable process, but it involves combining the right information with the right practical application.
