subject: How To Gain Confidence - Deal With Anxiety [print this page] Confidence and anxiety are opposites, right? When we picture in our minds a confident person, we dont really think of someone who is anxious.
But the reality is that confidence is not the lack of anxiety. It is being able to manage your anxiety.
We often feel that with any negative emotions, that the best way to deal with them is to deny them. Block them out. Stop them from rearing their ugly heads.
But denial is a short term strategy at best. When we deny something, it ends up showing itself in different ways. It expresses itself in ways you might not even have expected. If you deny that you are anxious, you might win the battle of confidence, but not the war. The anxiety is still there, you just havent acknowledged it. As we know, just because you ignore something doesnt mean it can hurt you.
So what about taking a totally different approach? Embrace the anxiety. After all, anxiety has a purpose. It is supposed to keep us out of trouble. That is its purpose, but it often overshoots the mark, and makes us avoid things that would be good for us, but are new and uncomfortable. Our anxiety hates new and uncomfortable and so it serves as a signal to avoid those things.
In other words our anxiety is a self-protective mechanism that is slightly off the mark. But thats ok. You can accept and embrace the anxiety as a sign that your body is trying to protect you. You accept and thank your body for the concern and then do it anyway.
If you can see your anxiety for what it is (a protection mechanism), then you can work with it better. Its not such an unpleasant emotion. Its a necessity, and its on your side. Deal with anxiety. Embrace it and be confident.
