subject: Don't Let A Failed Relationship Destroy You [print this page] Don't Let A Failed Relationship Destroy You
Finding romantic love is what we all strive to achieve in our lives but when love goes terribly wrong it can have some fairly devastating consequences. When we experience that all consuming, potent, head over heels kind of love we never want it to end. We all know it's difficult to find and when we do find that special someone, "the one" we recognise it instantly and life is never the same again. It's as though our lives are finally complete.
When a relationship starts falling apart we often hold onto the belief that it is worth fighting for and so we do our best to save it. When we see our loved one act out of character we exercise a degree of patience and understanding in the hope that they will return to their old self again soon. Because of love we give our loved one the benefit of the doubt, time to sort themselves out and provide them with ample opportunities to put things right and repair the damage they have caused. When we are promised that they will improve their behaviour, stop certain habits or stop seeing the intruding third party we believe them because we love them. But when they continue to make mistake after mistake, break promise after promise we must acknowledge that some people are not worth the effort and are a wasted cause. It is then we must come to terms that the relationship needs to end no matter how hard our heart objects.
The demise of a relationship can be attributed to any number of factors; the main ones being incompatibility, physical and/or mental abuse, drug, alcohol or gambling problems and infidelity. All too often one or both parties jeopardises their relationship when they take their partner for granted, gets complacent, fail to communicate properly with each other, neglects the other, or cheats. Statistics show that around half of all marriages will end in divorce within the first 5-7 years and second marriages have a 70% chance of failing.
The recovery period after a break-up can vary depending upon the depth of love felt and the level of emotional attachment. Some people are so badly affected by a break-up that they are unable to function normally for a very long time afterwards. Loss of love can cripple us emotionally and leave us with some devastating side affects apart from the obvious heartache and pain. Some people experience intolerable anguish which can have profound effects on the human mind and body resulting in weight loss, sleep deprivation, hair loss and sadly, in extreme cases suicide which is a person's inability to cope with pain.
You can't let a failed relationship destroy you because you willwaste your life if you do. Shutting yourself away from the world, alienating friends and family, giving up on life, refusing to re-enter the dating scene will simply delay your future and prevent you from being happy again. You must find the courage to move forward You must find a way to heal even though you find it terribly hard to do so. The way in which you handle a break-up will display your true strength of character. Some people can't move on unless they carry out some act of revenge, they want to punish the person who hurt them. How many times have we read stories in the press about crimes of passion? Women who seek to get even with their cheating husbands/boyfriends by smashing his car, setting fire to his personal belongings or in the extreme case, poisoning him? It happens all the time. The best form of revenge is to have a life well lived. Maintain your dignity, stay true to yourself and your core beliefs and lead a full, eventful and exciting life. Have satisfaction in knowing that he is missing out on the wonderful journey and will never be a part of it again. Don't compromise your dignity, your freedom, your vitality by trying to get even, walk away because he's simply not worth it.
It's understandable to feel lost and unsure what to do when a break-up occurs. You thought your life was heading in one direction but then find it forced into another.Theremedyfor any break-up is change. You need to change your environment to remove reminders of him and the pain associated with him from your life. So this means if you lived together, move house, if you worked together change jobs. Go on a trip and recharge your batteries, come back refreshed and if someone new takes interest in you there's no harm in having a coffee and chat with them. Just don't rush into anything. Make sure you're ready. Engage in new activities, pursue things you've always wanted to do but never seemed to have time for before. Enjoy time with your friends and family. Try to laugh as often as you can it's a great remedy, it lightens the heart.
Time does heal all wounds so have faith in knowing you'll be okay again one day soon. And remember, what doesn't kill you will definitely make you stronger.
