subject: How Can You Tell If You Are In A Toxic Marriage? [print this page] The following are just a few helpful clues:
- Your partner frequently puts you down (verbally) in front of others.
- Although your partner says they love you, their actions dont back it up.
- Your partner is controlling reading your mail or showing up at places you are just to check up on you.
- Your partner tries to make you dependent on them.
- You have or have to continuously change things about yourself to please your spouse.
Being around toxic people all the time can make you ill just by being around them. How is it possible, then that anyone would wind up in a relationship that is toxic? Who would stay with someone that makes them feel harmed emotinally and/or physcially all the time?
One reason is that many people in toxic relationships grow up in toxic homes. As a result, they replicate the patterns of their childhood without even knowing theyre doing it. And, they may not know any better. Others believe they do not merit happiness. Still others find that they enjoy taking care of people.
The first step in getting out and staying out of toxic relationships is to realize that you do have choices. After you realize that you do have several options, you can start by taking charge and standing up for yourself. In most unhealthy relationships, the toxic partner has taught you that it is all your fault. Once you whole heartedly buy into this, it can be very difficult to either walk away from the relationship or set new limits that can heal the relationship.
It's very true, that most realtionships can be rescued. Sometimes it takes a little space. Other times, it may take professional counseling. But if both partners make an attempt, it is possible to renew the bonds in a healthy way.
A healthy relationship is a two way street. If you're in toxic marriage, then the street only travels one way You have the power to change that, but you must take the power into your own hands.
