subject: Dealing With Angry Behavior - Your Home Could Soon Be A Happier Place Again [print this page] Dealing With Angry Behavior - Your Home Could Soon Be A Happier Place Again
Coping with angry outbursts, negative thinking and the victimization stance that many angry children take, certainly makes life difficult for many parents. Imagine replacing angry behavior with a much kinder one. Having a much calmer atmosphere in the house where it would be a joy to come home to reasonably behaved children and where there is no yelling. Maybe this is a mirage, maybe not. I know many parents who have followed child behavior modification techniques and who have much happier homes now.
So, why all the anger? The hormonal changes which accompany adolescence together with mounting pressure from peer groups, teachers and parents all add up to an explosive situation for many a teen. Add to that concerns about their body image and how they are or are not accepted by their peer group and it really is an explosive mixture which usually finds its outlet in angry behavior. The slamming of doors and the sullen silences are just two ways of expressing all that.
The angry behavior does not require an angry response on the part of the parents. Rather the opposite as we have to make sure that the lines of communication remain open at all costs. If we have our own angry moment, then there is no communication taking place.
Many teens feel that they have no one to listen to at all. Parents should always make sure that the door is open and that the teen can count on their loving support. Now try telling them that instead of the usual lecture about breaking a curfew. You might be surprised at the response!
I know some families have a winding down policy for everyone, each day as they arrive from school and work. There are no arguments or talking at all during this time which is established as strictly private. If this is regularly applied, it can defuse a lot of situations.
If you feel that the anger in your teen is not normal, then you should seek professional help. There may be much more going on here especially if the anger is accompanied by long crying sessions, threats of self injury and a lot of depression and sadness.
Normally though, there are ways we can deal with angry behavior which falls within the norm for any teenager going through a turbulent period. There are ways of dealing with this which any good child behavior program will take you through in easy stages and help you to cope. The hope that your home will soon become a harmonious place again is not a mirage. It is a real possibility.
