subject: How To Become Someone Else For A Day [print this page] Forget costly surgery, you can take on a new identity by simply undertaking Mini hire at a luxury car rental company. Impossible? Definitely not. You can accessorise as you see fit, but it is really a simple process. To prove this point, I have put together a number of different scenarios which could have you transformed from an accountant to a headbanging rockstar in minutes.
Remember, presence is everything. If you are not willing to get into character, then this will fail. You need to consider what you want from the experience and, of course, what your budget is. Here are some of the options that await you - if you dare!
Mini Cooper
Checklist: At least 20 CD's packed with the latest hardcore rave music, preferably from Germany. Hair dye, living supplies, trendy clothing and massive sunglasses (preferably about three times the size of your face).
Execution: Get the car by securing Mini hire at the luxury vehicle hire company of your choice. The night before you collect, peroxide your hair until it is a bright white/yellow colour.
Combine long golfing pants with a pink shirt and cover your original face with the sunglasses. Once in the vehicle, put in any of the rave CD's, turn up the volume, refuse to smile and head out to the beachfront. Now, I'm not sure that these people ever actually get out of the vehicle so you should hang your elbow out the window, continuously drive down the same stretch of road and believe that everyone wants to be exactly like you. To avoid starvation, take a quick detour into a quiet cal du sac, remove the glasses to access your mouth and consume the living supplies. When done, repeat the entire process until the sun sets.
BMW X5
Checklist: BMW X5 hire, extremely casual clothing, lots of gold jewellery, a chest carpet, expensive sunglasses and absolutely no work to do.
Execution: Today you are playing the part of a successful business man who wants to look important but has nothing to do. You need to make a list of the busiest roads possible for you to stop in. You will be covered in gold jewellery from head to toe, so try not choose places where walking would be required.
Once you are dressed and at your location, simply park in a loading zone with at least a quarter of the vehicle still in the road. You don't care, you are in a BMW. Get out the vehicle with purpose, attract the attention of anyone near you and murmur something so that the rest of the street believes you are giving out orders. As the person walks away, turn your head and glare at the string of traffic stuck behind your car, get in slowly and drive off using no indicators.
The opportunities are endless. Become a supercar driver with a keychain that is the size of a small truck and bears the logo of the vehicle, so that everyone can see it, or put in some gold plated teeth and let off some caps from the seat of a stretch Hummer limo - just have fun!
