subject: Get Your Ex Back - Do This And You Are Doomed! [print this page] There is a ton of free information out there that promises to help you to get your ex back. There are experts around every corner that claim to hold the keys to your success with varying pieces of advice, tips and tricks. And while much of this advice might hold some value to you in certain circumstances it is unfortunate that many folks follow this advice and wind up worse off than they were when they started. You see, on the internet anyone can be an expert at whatever they say their an expert at. The trick is being able to use a little common sense and put some thought into what you believe the outcome will be of following their advice.
While a lot of advice is commonly accepted as being true, right and effective, I am probably going to blow away some of the relationship experts here. I simply dont want you to take this advice at face value and destroy what little chance you might have during this precarious time in your relationship. A few wrong moves really can destroy the chances that you do have of getting your ex back or, if nothing else, delay the amount of time its going to take to get them back.
Wait - You may have heard this advice from family or heard the saying that you should set your ex free and if they were really yours they will come back to you. While this method does hold some value in that it is important to give your ex a little space and time, completely cutting off all communication with your ex and hoping that they will come back to you is just foolish. Common sense should tell you that there is a pretty good chance that your ex will think that you have moved on and then feel free to move on themself.
If youre cool with the thought of your ex starting up a rebound relationship with someone else and doing what they have to do to break the bond with you then that is fine. But there should come a time when you do what is necessary yourself to get your ex back. This means putting forth some sort of effort to rebuild the relationship using methods that are both effective and proven. Benign neglect rarely cures anything and it can often take years for the sit and wait method to bring about the results you are looking for.
Counseling - If you have mental issues or are really having a hard time with the grief from your breakup then a little counseling might be in order. But to suggest that dragging your ex into counseling to work through your issues is a good way to get them to come back to you would be ludicrous. Right now your ex doesnt want the relationship and chances are they have nothing to discuss. They think that you were the problem or they fell out of love with you or the relationship was a mistake or one of a thousand other excuses that people use to leave a relationship. Their resolution to the problems in the relationship was to end the relationship so there is little to discuss.
This method of restoring a relationship is often the product of counselors. Of course they want you to go to counseling. for years! This is how they make their living and if nobody went to counseling they would be flipping burgers instead of using their degree!
Just as a side note, typically once a couple gets back together there is little talk of what happened formerly in a relationship. Both partners might take responsibility for what they did to contribute to the decline in the relationship and agree to wipe the slate clean and forget about the past. The simple truth is that nobody wants to talk about problems especially not when theyre in love. Love feels much better than pain so why not move in a direction where you get your ex to focus more on the love that you had and can have in the future instead of the painful things that happened in the past? Youre catching on, arent you?
While these are only a couple of the things that you might be thinking of or pieces of advice that you have heard from so called experts, it often takes some patience and a good poker face to be able to get your ex back. Sometimes a skillfully laid out plan that you agree to stick to is all that is needed to bring your ex back around. Have confidence in your ability to get your ex back and find out what has worked for others in some of our other articles and avoid taking tips from so called experts that just dont make sense.
